My Soldier

The valor of a soldier

 

Beckoned by a lingering tale,

Told countless times before

She held her hand across her heart,

And heard his words once more.

The silence in the morning air

Hung tightly like a shroud,

As gasps and cries before her

From mothers in the crowd.

So soon she would be fighting

A mask upon her face,

A weapon tucked against her soul

A soldier in her place.

The shrieking of a siren,

The sound of bullets pass,

She remembers what her father said

It only counts who’s last.

And now the only fear she keeps

The sudden fear of death,

The slamming of a bullet and

The touch of angels breath.

Staring at the sky above

Her father’s eyes look back,

The fiery night is fading

As the ghost of life attacks.

Author's Note

I accidently put the title of the poem on the body of the poem. At the.moment I haven't figured out how to edit. So ignore the My Soldier, that is the title not the beginning.

update: I think I fixed it

Reviews

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Very good composition! You are a very good writer. I will try to do something like this style, if you won't mind. I really admire writers like you. I am inspired by this extraordinary piece.

[LynGeist]

Thank you very much. Imitation is the best form of flattery. I'm glad to know I have inspired you. Good luck and happy Writing.

[Lewis Davis-Norman]

The Ghost of life attacks - Haunting and resounding words that finish a brilliant poem. There are some particularly striking lines in here, especially 'The touch of angels breath' and 'A weapon tucked against her soul'. This is a piece of writing that does not bore at all but has simplistic nature that has a striking effect. Love it!

[LynGeist]

Thanks so much. I try to keep the words and rythymn simple but still paint a vivid and emotional picture. Don't always succeed but I have fun trying. :-)

[Green]

Actually, the first time I read this I was thinking something along the lines of a gladiatorial mother, but now having reread it, I would assume that's not what you were going for though it almost fits.
It's interesting that you chose a woman instead of a man since when most people hear the word soldier, they think of a man. It seems to have more impact with done with a woman, however, so I would say your choice paid off.
Good write.

[LynGeist]

Thank you. Yes I chose a woman soldier thinking it would bring a bit of surprise and a little shock value... Thanks for taking the time to tell me your thoughts.