First in Line

"I pray I would enter His gate first"

At times, when I look at your hair turning gray,

I can't help but to cry.

Because I know life is never permanent,

And I know that time will come that I'll never see you again.

I want to cherish my everyday with you.

I want to say thank you because God gave me you.

I want  to hug and kiss you all day long, mama.

I want you to feel like the best person in this whole entire world.

I am so sorry for acting barbaric and rude at times.

I am sorry for disobeying you, your orders all for my welfare.

I am sorry for being so disrespectful and creating troubles,

Troubles that eventually, you and papa will take over for me.

You have the sweetest smile and eyes, I have ever seen.

Your breath brings life to my darkest hours.

Your hugs are better than the teddy bears you gifted.

Your life is what I thank God for everyday.

I know this sounds unfair towards God,

For I can never stop Him from taking you.

I just wish I was up first,

Because I can never live without seeing you.

It would hurt a thousand times if you'll leave.

I wish I would enter the gates first.

I wish I would see Him first,

But sadly, I know that I can never have a say.

But you taught me that God knows what is best :)

Reviews

[Dahlia Phoenix]

This almost made me cry.

The emotion and sadness behind these words are heart wrenching. It is true, life isn't forever and the most unbearable pain is losing one's own parents. The one's who raised us to be who we are. Sometimes we can be rebellious toward those we care for but for that reason, we must know what to do. I love my own mother and I wish every moment of my life she was here with me along with my dad but they're in El Salvador. I miss them and I hope to see them again when I bring them back to U.S. I feel connected to this poem. Thank you.

[Jeremy Baker]

Emotional and taut.

[HeIsWe]

I like it

[Raven Starhawk]

There is a fear of death in this reader but merely because like most I do not understand it. But this poem of yours is a brilliant display of the pull between life and death.