20 Unspoken Societal Rules

Speculations based off observations in my own life. Needless to say, I’ve broken all twenty.

1. Don’t ever be poor. That includes being born into poverty.
2. Don’t ever get laid off
3. Don’t ever have to flee your home to save your own life.
4. Don’t ever be homeless, even and especially if it’s because of Rule 3.
5. Never get sick
6. Never get injured
7. Never be hungry
8. Never get sick as a consequence of being hungry/homeless. If you’re a kid, you’ll end up having to repeat a grade over attendance. If you’re an adult, you’ll probably be the first target for layoffs.
9. Never get in a car accident, especially when it took your family 15 years to save up for the car. It doesn’t matter that the other driver is on your side of the road and that you are trapped between telephone poles, other cars and other solid objects
10. Don’t ever not own a car. If you don’t own a car, you don’t deserve to have a job. It doesn’t matter that you intend to save for a car with your earnings, or that your job duties do not entail tasks for which a car is required.
11. Don’t question your (so-called) “betters”. They are always right. Even when they aren’t
12. Don’t call out your boss for immoral acts. By virtue of being the boss, anything and everything he could possibly do is moral
13. Never be a bully target. If you are, it’s your fault and you deserve it because you don’t have social skills. It doesn’t matter that you had absolutely no trouble making friends in  every other environment you’ve experienced.You still lack social skills simply because the bullies singled you out
14. Don’t be a nonconformist. If you are, make sure you’re the “conformist nonconformist” type that conforms to a DIFFERENT label from the most common label in your area. Otherwise, you’re a “fake *insert label here*” when you never wanted to be labeled to begin with
15. Never have money in the bank if you live in Section 8 housing. You’ll be penalized for saving. If you can afford to save money toward buying non-section 8 housing, you can afford higher section 8 rent so you can stay trapped in the government aid quagmire forever
16. Don’t be unemployed. Even more, don’t ever receive Unemployment Insurance. It doesn’t matter that you had to work a certain length of time and make a certain amount when working to begin with. If you get UI, you are automatically lazy. Too lazy to work. After all, that’s the only reason someone could possibly be unemployed.
17. Don’t be anything other than straight as a ruler. Bisexual, homosexual, transexual, pansexual, asexual and anything else not heterosexual are not okay.
18. Don’t be a woman. If you are, you’re only good for being a sex toy and a source of food and procreation.
19. Don’t be both poor and in the 97th percentile on every “intelligence” test and standardized test. You’ll make Social Darwinists uneasy and incur their need to lash out at you and drag you down to their level of intelligence. You won’t succeed in school anyway, no matter how smart you are (Stepping out of sarcastic bitter vein for a second- my first grade teacher made the prediction that I would be incarcerated in  jail for my “criminal insanity” in challenging her views during class before I was 13 and never graduate. Wrong on both counts.She also got teacher of the year… which should lend you some insight about where you live)
20. Don’t be both poor and well-spoken/adept at handling social situations like country clubs as a more affluent friend;s guest or political events on campus. Actually, wait, that’s not possible, because CLEARLY poor people are incapable of adapting to surroundings different from their own. As such, you must be exaggerating about how much your family struggled from when you were little

Author's Note

If you are a social Darwinist or the sort of person who believes your favorite major political party can do no wrong and that your political party is a bastion of good while the other is Hitler-level evil, I WILL likely offend you at some point- you have been warned.

ADDENDUM: I know other places have their own issues, but as I only know my own life and have never been outside the United States because I am too poor, I cannot pass judgment on the unspoken rules of other places with nonexistent direct experience, and it would be stereotyping if I made assumptions based off one individual . Nor can I understand certain other societal wrongs (such as how it truly feels to be a minority because I am not subjected to the sorts of reprehensible assumptions the ignorant make about them) firsthand. Hence writing only about what I can thoroughly understand based off personal experience.

Reviews

[Mila]

Very interesting observation. It gives us a good insight into your perspective based on what you've been through in life!

[NoelHC]

Interesting observations on life, and the vicious circle that we can find our self in.
I admire your spirit and strength working through this.

[yashmita13]

woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooww...........

[AllAlone]

Very much enjoyed reading your list. I unfortunately broke almost all the rules.

[avant security guard]

hi LI person
this is really wild--I like it a lot
keep writing humor
there's too little of it
still amazed by this--maybe could be broken up as chapter headings for a novelette, with some dialogue between the girl with no money and the country club person, and some guy she meets there--here's a plot thingy--the kids I met at the country club thought everybody else was a snob, so most of them didn't speak to each other

[Chris]

Chuckling here... After reading this I think you'll fit right in here at WC... or at least sideways - or maybe with a touch of applied insanity... or perhaps with a smile of malice of forethought... or...

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

Thank00! Love le image by the way, reminds me of a cross between Gandalf and Dumbldore. And that would be interesting indeed, considering my metaphorical shape is a seeming trapezoid with a rounded bottom

[A. Amos]

SH I have to say your genius, these are eyes opening points and you have done a brave job..respect

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

Thanks so much! =0)

[Brian F. Lockard]

Sad that most of these are true lol though I will say that 17 and 18 may have been relevant 60 years ago.

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

You'd be shocked how many people have mindsets perfectly matching 60 years ago

[paddy d daly]

I note you exclude all other nationality in your authors note apart from American, I have great respect for Americans but not your type with your tunnel vision tea party views, time you woke up and realised there is another world out there apart from THE US

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

You're right, I did. Not out of not knowing there's a world outside the United States, but because as I said in the blurb, it is mere speculations based off my life. I've never been outside the United States because I cannot afford to travel, thus the only concept I have of the world outside comes from newspapers that may not always be accurate and individuals I meet online. It would not feel right to pass judgement of any sort on someplace I've never been, or to stereotype a while country off one or two people I've met.

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

The above said, I replaced "American" with "person" as well as clarified that my conjectures stem from my own experiences and observations (since as asserted I have no right to judge what I don't know) in case anyone else misses that in the blurb.

[Chaz Hemsworth]

All true statements. Sad how 18 is. I feel like a monster myself for having never broken these rules. Then again, I'm 16.

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

You're not a monster, you're lucky. (I broke many of them before I was 10, I'm in 20s now) I hope your luck lasts your entire life (=

[Chaz Hemsworth]

Well I guess I'm *too* lucky. As in, this makes me realize how undeserving I am of my nce things.

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

Nah, not undeserving, not if you realize just how lucky you are. Remember it, use the luck you were born with to help the less fortunate, and you shall karmically earn it a million times over, so to say. [=