The Phoenix

I think inspiration is birth out of wonder. And we need to practice wonder, consciously. With little everyday things. To overcome that jadedness.

It looms like a cloud over me, 

a growing mountain range 

rising from the cityscape horizon

Weaving itself full of bindings

It's foul menace greys in its greed

A pregnant malice with outstretched wings

Vast. 

Lo, with thunder it bursts into tears

Sudden and cleansing in its birth

I stay out. Out in its anointing ash

For not till all is washed away will i hide

and there is nothing left.

Author's Note

All opinions are more than welcomed, they're appreciated and (to be frank) needed. thank you!

Reviews

[Indra Neil]

a profound and deep brevity with vivid imagery! brilliant composition! well done!!

[hanselwheresgretel?]

Glad you liked it! please feel free to scrutinise the rest ;)

[Indra Neil]

I will! :)

[Dara]

I have always been fascinated by the image of the Phoenix rising out from the ashes. A beautiful metaphor and so inspiring just as your poem is. Great job!

[hanselwheresgretel?]

Appreciate your kind words, Dara! especially from one who writes so much and well :)

[Dara]

I am very humbled by your words. Thank you so much!

[Ella]

I love it! ( I am knit picking here, but "vast, outstretched wings") might sound better. My favorite is the last stanza. It is so well-written!!

[hanselwheresgretel?]

please! pick all the knits you want ;) love and appreciate the input and encouragement!

[Ella]

haha I will ;). Of Course, any time!

[JulianaSun]

If I were to describe your writing style, I would say that your words are like vines that keep wreathing around the mind, forcing it to reflect - over and over again - upon what it has red. Your poems have so much life in them. They´re wonderful :)

J

[hanselwheresgretel?]

You are too kind, Ju :) Glad and surprised it had that effect on you. let me know what you think about the rest too, your opinion matters! :)