Chapter 3

Chapter 3

A Chapter by Dr. YumnaKay

It was a fifteen minute drive to Drake’s apartment. Julian checked his watched as they pulled outside his building and Kevin honked the horn.


“We’d better not be late” Julian said with a slight edge to his voice “ ‘cause we do have to change our disguises before boarding the plane.”


“Ju, please, mate, you’re giving me the creeps” Kevin gave an exasperated look to him but he was saved the trouble of replying as Drake came out.


“Phew, how’s it, buddies?” Why do you look as if you’re snuffed, Julian?” He guffawed while stuffing in the back seat. The cronies he’d brought looked tough and thuggish as they too slid in beside Drake, Julian observed from the back mirror.


“Oh, this is Jim,” He pointed to the man with short blond hair and a set of pimples. “And this is Carter.” He waved his hand towards the other one who seemed too robotic as his eyes gazed at the front.


Julian acknowledged them with a nod while Kevin said nothing.


“And these are our, erm, you could say, bosses” Drake smirked as he told their names to his men.


Drake was a heavy set man in his early thirties and he looked it too. With pale features and straw colored hair, he really did seem like a boss.


“So, it’s gonna take the whole day, right?” All eyes turned towards Julian.


“Yes, after the plane is fully under our control, you’ll receive further instructions from the man, who will inform you of the next location."


“What’s the location?” Drake asked gruffly.


“Well, we’re still on a need to know basis and there’s going to be an accomplice of that man on the plane to guide us towards it.”


“Wait, what?? I thought you told me we’d know on the morn of the flight, Ju?” This is so not how we do it! That man could be a hoax! What if we get into a big time trouble after we board it?” Drake’s voice boomed in the chevvy.


“It’s not gonna happen. Trust me when I say this man has influence and I trust my instincts, okay?” Julian more told himself than Drake.


“Your instincts?” He said sarcastically as he continued. “That’s gotta be a joke, man! Your instincts have had you in trouble the first place than if you had left it to fate!” He smirked.


“Then let’s say I’m counting more on fate this time to turn things our way. Besides, I have you, Drake. Won’t you be able to handle if it went wrong?” He said with a confident look of innocence.


“I may not always be there, pal! But of course I got your back.” Drake huffed but fell silent after that.


Julian didn’t mind Drake’s attitude. The man had been a sort of his savior when he’d been on the brink of failure. After getting his law degree from college, he’d worked at a firm. But all of that had been turned to smoke by one major accident in his life. The thing which had turned his whole life upside down. And that was when Kevin had introduced him to his friend Drake, a man who looked tough on the outside but had been like a brother for Julian.


It was true; this wasn’t what he’d thought he’d be doing. Who wants to be known as a criminal? He thought. But this was different. This time they weren’t going to rob a bank or kidnap someone for a petty sum of money. This hi jacking would change his life. It was going to be the most exhilarating experience of his life; he savored in the sweet taste of success coming their way.

 

He had no idea, how exhilarating and life turning this event was going to be.

 

 

 

 




© 2017 Dr. YumnaKay



My Review

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Featured Review

Aloha Yumna, this was good. Laying foundations; I think the framework is there, and with some polishing this will read beautifully. The story is intriguing and it sounds like these guys have been around the block a few times. A hi-jacking is pretty big time, the next few chapters will be interesting. Izzy

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

6 Months Ago

I hope to write that part soon 'cause it's still in the drafting stage.
They aren't professio.. read more



Reviews

Julian, Kevin, Drake, Jim & Carter . . . that's a lot of characters to throw at us in one little space of story. Some are described better than others. Some seem to disappear as soon as they're mentioned. The dialogue isn't clear who's talking when there are so many possible speakers. I think this could be simplified somehow, maybe by not mentioning the extra characters. Maybe they could be omitted from the story or maybe they can just be referred to as "thugs in the backseat" so we don't have to try to remember who is who. In general, I believe it's better to introduce one character at a time, spend a little time showing us something memorable about this character, before going on to introduce another. Otherwise, we have no idea where all these guys fit into the story & whether we should try to remember who is who, or if there are just some faceless extras thrown in to give a feeling of "a bunch of thugs".

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


Aloha Yumna, this was good. Laying foundations; I think the framework is there, and with some polishing this will read beautifully. The story is intriguing and it sounds like these guys have been around the block a few times. A hi-jacking is pretty big time, the next few chapters will be interesting. Izzy

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

6 Months Ago

I hope to write that part soon 'cause it's still in the drafting stage.
They aren't professio.. read more
Ok so an Undercover Spy!?

Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

6 Months Ago

Nah not at all... 😉😛
Number one... are they british? :P
Cause...
"“Ju, please, mate, you’re giving me the creeps”
Lots of british people say "mate"
#HarryPotterReference :D
This chapter was again hooking and kept me on the edge of my seat, wondering if they were going to hijack the plane :D
The words flew together nicely and the dialogue as well :)
Keep it up Yumna!


Posted 6 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Mr.Writer

6 Months Ago

I'll be devouring the rest of your chapters this weekend :D
#Excited :)
Dr. YumnaKay

6 Months Ago

Cool. Although there aren't much. I still have to add/write a lot more lol but thank you for followi.. read more
Mr.Writer

6 Months Ago

No problem :)
Again, go a bit more in depth with the characters. I have nothing else. It's very intriguing

Posted 8 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

8 Months Ago

I will 😊
Thank you so much! I'm glad you find it intriguing 😊

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Added on March 2, 2017
Last Updated on March 17, 2017


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Dr. YumnaKay
Dr. YumnaKay

Karachi, Sindh, Pakistan



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