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Soul Mates & Soul Families
14 Years Ago
by John L. Payne
There is much conjecture and misunderstanding concerning this
subject. When most of you speak of a soul mate, you are thinking of that one
special individual that you will fall in love with and with whom you will live
happily ever after. You may even feel as if this one special love has always
been your lover through many, many lifetimes and that you are simply awaiting
his or her appearance in this lifetime.
Many souls do encounter one another in lifetime after lifetime after
lifetime, for they have become friends. This friendship is based in the
non-physical world, and the friendship, which in essence is co-operation, is
based upon their past success in achieving the growth they are seeking. You see,
you are growth-seeking beings, and all encounters, both physical and
non-physical, provide opportunities for growth. Therefore, if there is a certain
soul with whom you have had great success in achieving your goals, you are
likely to agree to work with that one again.
It is important to understand how souls are organized. Your journeys here
into the physical world are deliberate journeys. You have already mastered life
on many other planes of existence, and your purpose for coming to Earth is
simply so that you may broaden your experience of yourself through the Earth
existence. The ultimate goal is to experience unconditional love, that which is
acceptance and allowing. For as you totally accept Earth life and accept all the
aspects of it and all that exists within it, you have reached your goal. Some
have called this enlightenment. You see, you didn't come here to get better or
to prove yourself worthy; you came here for the fun of it, for the game, for the
challenge.
Before such journeys are undertaken, souls organize themselves into groups.
You could see these as support groups. Souls organize themselves into Families,
Groups, Clans, Nations, and Grand Nations. There are seven souls in a Soul
Family and seven families in a Soul Group, and seven groups in a Soul Clan, and
so on. Eventually, you will work with most members of your Soul Clan, that is
343 individual souls. However, for those of you who are teachers, you will more
than likely reach your Soul Nation or Grand Nation, which totals almost 17,000
souls.
The majority of your relationships, close friendships, and associations will
be with souls who are from your Group of 49 souls. However, this is not always
the case. The more you advance in terms of acceptance (love), the more skilled
you will become at working with individuals who have a different energy
signature than yourselves. What we mean by energy signature is the following:
each Soul Group will be working towards a particular goal.
For example, many members of one Soul Group could be concerned with
communication and teaching, another with healing, another with courage, another
with self-acceptance. This does not mean that each of you will manifest in the
same way and lead identical lives, but it does mean that the essence of your
lives will be very similar. You will have similar ideals, aspirations, likes,
and dislikes. The people you are most drawn to are almost always members of your
Soul Family, Group, Clan or Nation, but as with everything, there are exceptions
to the rule.
A Soul Family will work together for many, many lifetimes. Sometimes a Soul
Family will regroup and different alliances will be made. This is rare, but it
happens. In addition, the entire Soul Family will be involved in decision making
regarding future lifetimes and will assist you in assessing your achievements in
a lifetime just past. Your Soul Family is always there for you. For the most
part, not all members of a Soul Family are incarnate at the same time. Those
members who are not incarnate act as spirit guides during the physical life of
the one who is incarnate. They can visit you in dreams, inspire you with
thoughts, or in some cases, speak to you directly during meditation. Many of the
spirit guides that have presented themselves to humans are indeed discarnate
souls who are members of the individual's Soul Family. However, many of the
Master Teachers that present themselves to humans are either members of the
individual's Nation or Grand Nation and are souls whose Earth experience is
complete. At times these Master Teachers can be souls that are even broader and
vaster than this.
A soul mate is any soul that is a member of this broader group and anyone
that touches your life. The net effect of a soul mate on your life will always
be positive, even if you cannot see it at the time. For example, many have the
notion that a soul mate relationship will be the ideal relationship, full of
harmony and love. However, a relationship with a soul mate is likely to be
challenging!
The whole point of a soul mate turning up in your life is to show you to
yourself. That is the purpose of all human relationships. You learn through
viewing in the mirror. The Law of Attraction works in every aspect of your life,
and therefore each person drawn into your life is there through vibration, and
nothing else. They are present because your vibration and their vibration are
matched in some way.
As we have said before, you are growth-seeking beings. So many of you get
confused when you meet the person of your dreams, fall happily in love, declare,
"This is my soul mate," and then have to pick up the pieces a few years down the
road when the relationship breaks up or the person you loved turns out to have
some problems or personality traits you do not care for. However, this was your
soul mate, and you have many!
As you re-enter each lifetime, you make agreements with many different souls,
perhaps as many as 20. You agree on what you will offer one another. These souls
can be your children, your best friend, husband, wife, worst enemy, boss,
business partner, any number of possibilities, and even the schoolteacher that
encouraged you with patience and kindness. However, as you, the personality,
have free will, you may create a path that takes you in a different direction,
and this is why you have to make possible agreements with so many. The Universe
works on the principle of vibration.
Let us give you an example: There is Joe who is a fine soul indeed. However
Joe, for quite a few lifetimes now, has been struggling with powerlessness in
the physical realm. His struggle has led him into violence and even to
developing addictions to alcohol. Mary, on the other hand, for some time now has
had difficulties in valuing herself, always choosing second best, and always
giving her power away. So Joe and Mary coordinate their lives and set up a
strong probability to meet. Their intention is that Mary and Joe will fall in
love and work towards resolving their respective issues. In her relationship
with the alcoholic Mary will learn that she must begin to make choices that
reflect her self-worth. Joe, on the other hand, wants to learn that he cannot
possess or control anyone, for power must come from within. However, Mary finds
herself often challenged during the course of her life, and at college the
establishment challenges her ideas and values. Instead of capitulating, as was
her custom in previous lives, she stands up for herself and chooses to value
herself. At that moment her vibration changes and therefore Joe is no longer
necessary.
It could happen that she may meet Joe, but it would more than likely be a
passing meeting and one in which she could share with him what she had learned.
She may indeed end up being the counselor at an alcohol rehabilitation center,
for example, but Mary no longer requires an intimate relationship with Joe. At
this stage both Joe and Mary set up new vibrations so that they connect with
their other possible soul mates.
When you look back at your life, you will see there are many people who have
had an impact on it. All of these people are your soul mates, and whether they
know it or not on the personality level, they love you dearly for you are all
working together towards one singular goal, and that is the goal of love.
"When we meet someone and an instant friendship or attraction occurs, does
that mean that this is a soul mate and that we have been together in past
lives?"
What it means is that there is compatibility in vibration, and this generally
means that there is a connection of sorts. Whether that soul be from your Soul
Family, Group, Clan, or Nation, there is a connection, a similarity of goal,
purpose, experience, and therefore vibration. However, this connection on the
soul level does not automatically indicate that you have met before. You may
never have met on the Earth plane, but the soul may be known to you in the
non-physical world. You do spend rather more time in the non-physical than you
do in the physical, for the non-physical world is your natural home. In the
non-physical world you have friends in very much the same way that you have
friends on Earth. Some friends are close to you, others are intimately
acquainted with you, and still others are acquaintances. Friendship in the
non-physical world has nothing to do with liking or not liking one another; it
has to do with compatibility of goals and aspirations. Your non-physical friends
also change, and they change according to your goals.
For example, you may have teamed up with a particular small group of souls to
work on survival issues. Each of you have had a few lives together in
inhospitable environments. You may have chosen to live in primitive cultures in
very cold climates or in desert regions. Such inhospitable environments help you
to become resourceful, inventive, creative, and self-sufficient. You may
however, choose to return to this adventure at a later stage and not complete
all of your 'learning' in one go. Or, you may progress at a faster pace than
your group members and decide to move on. Another choice could be to remain with
the group and become a leader or teacher amongst them, assisting them to
progress, which in turn assists you to progress even further for there is much
learning to be done whilst teaching. The possibilities are endless and the
choice is yours. If you decide to move on, you will join another group, or
perhaps work with one or two other souls. Your work with other souls may last
one Earth day, an entire lifetime, or several hundred lifetimes. You choose all
of these relationships, and each relationship is based on cooperation and the
desire to progress as quickly as possible.
"Are our parents and children Soul Mates and are they part of our Soul
Family?"
They are soul mates inasmuch as you not only know them, but you have chosen
to work with them for the specific purpose of achieving growth. No birth is an
accident, for all souls enter this world by agreement with both parents, even if
both parents are not present in childhood.
Your parents and siblings may very well all be members of your Soul Family,
but this is extremely rare. Normally, one, perhaps two, members of your
biological family will be from your Soul Family, but the rest will generally be
from your Group, Clan, Nation, or Grand Nation.
For the creation of a physical family the younger, less experienced souls
will tend to team up with souls that are very closely related to them. These
souls will often swap roles with one another from lifetime to lifetime,
sometimes being the child, at other times the parent, at one time the female, at
another time the male mate. The familiarity of the souls, one with another,
helps each individual soul to progress more quickly. When souls first enter the
physical plane, it seems to them to be a hostile place indeed. They are confused
and wary of the physical body and are very susceptible to the biological impulse
to survive. They are often caught up in fight or flight choices. The Universe is
loving and supportive, and therefore it creates feelings of security to be
surrounded by souls with whom you are very familiar. However, as with everything
in the Universe, this is only general. It is not a hard and fast rule, for older
souls can and do enter into these kinds of arrangements.
Many older souls choose to be born into families where perhaps only one
member is well known to them, and perhaps this soul is from their Soul Group or
Clan, not as closely related as a Soul Family member. They will make this choice
because older souls are really concerned with introspection more than anything
else. They may be preparing to teach or to become a leader in one field or
another, and the experience of feeling 'the odd one out' will lead them towards
self-examination. Instead of getting caught up with the function and duty of
'family' these souls will often be seen to be the 'black sheep' or viewed as
different or eccentric by other members of the biological family.
Although these circumstances may lead to difficult personal challenges, the
lessons are almost always internal rather than external. This means that there
will be an emphasis on self-acceptance. Self-acceptance is an integral part of
soul development. If we were to liken the Earth experience to education,
mastering self-acceptance is equivalent to studying for your doctorate. Once you
have self-acceptance under your belt, you are pretty much on the home run!
"Why do so many of us search endlessly for the 'one true love' in the hope of
finding our soul mate?"
What you are looking for is acceptance. You believe that this 'one true love'
will accept you without conditions. Your search for that one is in fact the
search for self-acceptance. Each relationship is there to provide you with a new
opportunity to know yourself. It is through knowing yourself that you can then
grow to accept yourself and to love yourself. The one true love is self-love;
there is no other love.
The greatest secret of all, discovered by the Christ and the Buddha and many
others, was the secret of falling in love with the self. When you love the self,
you are in a state of acceptance, total acceptance. As you accept, you cease
resisting the world and all that is in it. As you give up resistance, you allow
everything to be as it is. As you allow everything to be as it is, God can work
through you. It is at this point that you can say, "I and the Father are one,"
for you will be at one with the source of all life. You will be at one with
love!
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