I Am Woman Forum What to do???? Please Help!!!

you cant act as if it didnt happen b/c it DID happen and you will drive yourself nuts over it... believe me... i have sorta been in this situation...

the girlfriend - was this his way of leaving her... hoping she would find out about it?

men -- sigh

I personally feel that you need to talk him about this. You need to set the record straight about how you would feel about you two having sex. Yes you two are best friends but he still needs to respect that boundary plus he used you to cheat on his girlfriend which isn't right. But either way you need to let him know how you feel. If you don't want to have sex with him again than you need to say something. By not saying something you are basically giving him permission to do it again. If you want more sex or more of a relationship with him than you need to say something along those lines as well. Personally the girlfriend is a big factor. You also need to determine exactly what are your feelings for him. Do you see you two as friends only? Friends with benefits? Potential long term partners? This is an important factor as well. Especially if sex is involved.

Kate

Talk to him if you have not already. Set some ground rules if sex is not what you want and set the record straight if it is what you want right now from him. But you said you see him like a brother, so this is like a betrayal to you much like cases of incest. I would even consider distancing myself from him to be sure that he knows he crossed a fine line and you don't appreciate it at all. Also, I think Kate and Nicole are right, he was up to something and he used you to get the deed done. Feelings of guilt and shame denotes to me that before the sex, he was not a love interest for you. I also feel, if you pursue this friendship, be mindful of speaking about sex with guys, no matter how good of a friend they are. I have been in your shoes and for me it got ugly. I just let the friendship go and moved on. I hate baggage and he had to go. LOL But certainly, TALK about it and get things straight with him.-Catrina

I have yet to talk to him about this. I've been so busy with school and work I haven't even been home to sleep. I know he's called me a few times but I really haven't had the time to pick up...I guess I am avoiding the convo, but I think I need more time to think about it I don't want to lose him a a friend. I know better than that though in all accounts I have lost him already.

Ya'll have been very helpful and I thank you I just have to find the time to let him know how I feel about the situaton. Thanks again


~~Theta