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A Guantanamo Bay Thanksgiving story! (A sad story, no matter how you slice it!)

14 Years Ago

Tom. During happier times.     The last known picture of Tom. Smuggled out of Guantanamo by a strict vegetarian.

I have learned, from sources too vague and obscure to be viewed as credible by the main stream media, that the turkey that was originally picked to be pardoned by president Bush at the annual White House Thanksgiving day ceremony in 2006 was instead the victim of a Homeland Security/CIA secret rendition transfer to Guantanamo Bay!

The turkey, who will be here-after referred to as "Tom" to hide his true identity, was incorrectly listed as a "person/turkey" of interest after his "country of origin" status was confused with his "type of critter" status by members of Bush's crazier than a sh!t house rat inner circle of advisors, apologists, spin doctors, and psych-ops dis-information team members.

Thinking (erroneously) that "Tom" was from Turkey, instead of just being one, he was lured to an out of the way location of president Bush's ranch, located on the outskirts of "Get Out Of Here", Texas. Under the illusion of being a part of a photo-op with Bush.

Even though "Tom" wasn't all that enamored with Bush's policies, he agreed to be seen in the president's presence after he was told that this year, for the first time in American history, a sitting U.S. president was going to pardon EVERY turkey that had been born in the U.S. of A.

As soon as "Tom" was out of the sight of every credible main-stream media source (Fox News had a full crew on hand to aid in the Bush ordered deception) he was tackled, hooded, injected with psychotropic drugs, Butterball Brand meat moisterizing tenderizers and flavor enhancers.

Then he was plucked and trucked to a nearby military base and placed on a military transport plane destined for Guantanamo.

He was listed on the cargo's manifest as processed meat by-product. A description that was prophetic of the fate that was awaiting poor Tom shortly after his arrival at Guantanamo.

I will spare you the full rundown as relates to the many different interrogation techniques that Tom was subjected to. But Tom's hellish end was finally achieved somewhere between the start and finish of 8 hours of non-stop electro shock.

The monsters that subjected Tom to such despicable indignities wouldn't desist until every last shred of his succulent, tender, and extremely flavorful meat had dropped off the bones of his cruelly treated carcass.

I believe this to be the most foul end that any fowl has ever suffered.

I doubt if the full story of Tom's last few hours on this planet will ever come to light. Mainly because when Tom's tormenters learned that word of his barbaric end had traveled beyond the walls of Guantanamo they immediately ate the evidence.

Oh! The humanity!

The moral of my story about "Tom" the turkey is this;

Never trust one turkey to do right by another.

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14 Years Ago

FUNNY!!!!      Fopah Bush Fopah ....
This is a clever & LOL piece..
I love the moral--last line is superb!
I hope this doesn't happen to future Toms
that stray across Dallas's elite neighborhood
enemy lines and are tempted to have a beer 
with the BIGGEST turkey of the Century...
Thanks for sharing... LeeLee Ryder