The Wood Beyond The World Forum Request

I'm currently writing the opening of a new piece of mine and I've ran into something of a block on it. I know where it needs to go but I can't seem to find the right words to continue it. If anyone would be able to take some time to help me on this it would be appreciated. Just let me know here if you are willing. If not don't worry about it I'm not exactly rushed on it and I'll be working on the first chapter of this piece as well (the section I need help on is kind of a prologue/teaser. I like using those sorry). Thanks everyone either way.

Sure! I'd love to help you break your writers block sometime.

If you have msn or email I could send you the file. It's not very long at the moment (just over 9 lines) so I could even post it here. I'd tell you what the experiment I'm doing on it is but it kinda gives away one of the big twists in the story lol.

I think you should go ahead and submit it -- if there are any explanations that would help us, include them in the post. Don't be shy!

I meant it's short enough I could actually post it in the forum lol. As said it's all of a few words over 9 lines.

Post it, man.

Posted it as a story

James, have no problem with the telling that almost feels 1st person. What I did have a problem with is that after the thoughts of this vamp...you jump into passive narration when you was in active telling. Is there a reason you go this route? Is the sections before this passive, a mix or what? I think your going to have to give a bit more so the reviewer have context.

I have no issues with lack of dialogue when the thoughts of the character are clearly expressed. It works just as well as dialogue.

Nick.

section prior is somewhat passive and I posted title of the entire work. I personally actually named this section 'recollection of a madman'