Writers Asylum Forum hitman have to be mean right?

well I dont know, I have been trying to write a short story I am calling: "Chronicles of a hitman" I have written and rewritten the begining 4 times now and havent gotten past 3 paragraghs each time. I know the jist of what I want, I know the character somewhat well. I have been watching as many: gansta/mob/hitman/thieving movies as I can for research sort of, but I think that is my problem, I am looking to other peoples views of the hitman/muscle of an organization. My guy is coming off to "soft" though as I am writing the situation he has found himself in. Damnit and it driving me nuts , though each time it gets a little more detailed I think of something else to add to make it more complete. Though my biggest hurdle is finding time and inspiration to write. I keep letting myself get distracted and go off doing other things , or just wasting time in general. I really need a work zone , but sharing a house is hectic enough without trying to set up my own "happy place" to work in. I havent even been doing my 5 minute writing warm ups. I have a messenger bag I finally bought a while back to put all of my writing stuff in , but now a days I just carry it around and hardly open it. I have tried to keep books out of it , I do have a couple in there, but no novels , I beleive they are too distracting while trying to create your own stories.

So I dont know what to do , should I just keep sitting and writing, should I stop and evaulate all the rewrites and take what I like and go from there? I have been taking all this time to get it into a short story , with intentions of taking it from there if I like it , or if anyone else does.

Well this was random at best and I really wasnt looking for specific answers , I think just typing it out has made me feel better. I am sure there are those of you currently suffering from the same insanity as me. So if any one is having similar anxiety please dont hesitate to tell us.

Thanks,
Nsan3
Keeper of the asylum

If it's the beginning you're sturggling with then maybe you should skip it and add in other aspects.
One thing I've noticed about people with rather unusual jobs such as coroners, hitmen (I don't know any of them actually), or anything else is that they tend to have a very warped sense of humor that helps them cope with their occupation. Some of them are outright blunt sarcastics and others are tongue in cheek comics.
People also tend to objectify the situation: This is not a body, a possible zombie, a cadaver. It's just the most life-like maniquin ever conceived. I could just as easily see this posing with the latest fashions in a mall window as I see it now lying here on the examination table.
A few questions to think about: Is he a lone man for hire or is he fully employed? What's his prefered means of taking out a target and why (chemicals, explosives or the never-will-die-classic rifle)? Does he like to be flashy or does he prefer it if nobody knows what hit them. Why is he a hitman, what in his past drew him to this career, was it a bad childhood or simply because it pays better than bagging groceries?
You say he's a bit too soft? What if that's just as much a cover as anything else and deep down he's dark enough to send a vampire running and screaming in fear.
Just a few thoughts to help you on your way.

thank you very much that has given me much to consider about this piece. I am now a little closer to ripping it out of my head

Make him/her however you want. They can be the nicest person in the world who kills people. It's not a new story so you want to give it something different. Maybe heshe's just sick of it all and wants to retre but can't, or he has post traumatic stress. Try to go in a new direction.