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people always say that life will get better.
that no matter how hard it gets,
theres always a reason to live.

 

 

i live in fear,
constantly alone.
no one knows how i feel.
no one can even begin to fathom
what floats around my mind.
suicide...
NO!
i will not leave,
not when i finally have people who care..
people who care about me..

 

it took years for me to trust someone,
years before i even cared.
i have friends now,
a family.
everything i ever wanted.
why do i feel alone?

 

they smile and watch me,
i smile back.
they unknowingly let me pass,
a fake smile pasted on my face.
they think everythings fine,
but that smile is my escape.
long ago i realized,
they think you're fine if you smile..
so i use it whenever i need it,
whenever i feel close to the edge.
i know one of these days,
i'll jump.
but not just yet.

 

weeks fly into months,
months fly into years.
i find myself older, wiser.
my mind has worked itself into a circle,
making itself believe that everyone i trust are gone..
i see a familiar face and i flinch,
realizing no one knows a thing.
i could go away...
no one would know..

 

i find myself at a crossroad.
do i stick around and watch life grow worse?
watch sick people on the streets,
people stealing, killing and molesting?

 

then an image of family and friends interrupts my thoughts.
my best friend dancing with me,
my mom holding me as i cried,
my grandma holding my hand when i was little,
my cousin laughing with me...
did i want to leave this behind?

 

as my mind processed the thoughts,
i reazlied,
no matter how hard life gets,
no matter how bad things look,
theres always something GOOD in there.
purely good.
and while nothing was always good,
i wanted to be here.
i didnt want to leave yet.

 

 

people always say that life will get better.
that no matter how hard it gets,
theres always a reason to live.

Reviews

[~D.A. Phoenix~]

Oh dear love,
There are more good things in life than bad. Problem is the bad things punch us in the gut before we can feel the worm touch of goodness that permeates life. I'm glad you plan on staying around. You know I care about you. ^_^

Happy Writing hun!
~DA Phoenix~
~K~