sometimes I die.

sometimes I die.

A Poem by lady pilot
"

Just another nothing about panic attacks after a long absence. (Not sure if its really "poetry" but oh well)

"
As I sat in the dark, I could feel my soul, inhabiting my body.
I felt my brain, my limbs in their proper place, and I felt my heart beat. Suddenly I knew I was going to die. I could see my whole life flash before my eyes. I could feel my brain wind down to a grinding halt. I knew I had no future, and I wouldn't do anything I ever wanted to. Wasn't going to be a fashion designer, a paleontologist, an actor, a noble prize winner, a microbiologist, a marrine, a politician, a writer... nothing. I was going to die young. And I knew it. I'm not going to lie and say it was bliss, or calm even. It was chaos. I fought fate. Told her no. I forced my brain to keep working, I cut a long life line into my Palm with a razor blade, I needed to live. I needed people to know who I was. To be world renown at least. I screamed, I lashed, I ripped my hair out. I prayed to any god or gods that might listen. Finaly I lied down on the ground in near-submission, only crying now. through sobs I whispered "please." And I lived.

© 2014 lady pilot


Author's Note

lady pilot
Not about depression. I swear.

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Reviews

I think it's really "poetry"! The kind that should be read aloud into a mic on a stage. I feel like you just wrote it/typed it all down non-stop and it turned out this awesome! It's like a huge inhale with a final exhale of relief. Nice job :)

Posted 9 Years Ago


lady pilot

9 Years Ago

Thank you so much ^-^

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Added on July 26, 2014
Last Updated on July 26, 2014
Tags: panic attacks, scary, death

Author

lady pilot
lady pilot

Taylorsville, KY



About
My name is Emily, hello there. Ive got some demons, Ive got some addictions. Ive got some words, so stick around. more..

Writing