I love

How letting myself drown in pain and self-pity nearly cost me people I hold so closely, how I've learned to love everything. The sadness, the people, everything.

I love the sadness

I drink the tears

My body feels best crumpled in despair

With eyes of pity on me

The pain is ecstasy

A drug that fulfills me

Like no one has or could

I’m addicted

Long nights of no sleep

Dark shadows under my eyes

My mouth, dry and my tongue, scratchy

Ringing in my ears

If I let you into my life

I know you’ll break my heart

It’s alright, I promise

I want you too

Everyone offers their cures

Everyone wants to help

But I don’t know

If I want to be fixed

I enjoy the self-harm

The deep cuts in my skin

But I hate the way it hurts you

I hate it more than anything

The selfishness of my actions

Nearly cost me you

I only thought I was hurting myself

But I was destroying you

I’ve learned to find the pleasure in your company

For every second I have with you

I’ve learned to find the beauty in life

I can see it in the reflection of your eyes

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Love is like a two-sided blade. We will know sweetness and maybe pain.
"I’ve learned to find the pleasure in your company
For every second I have with you
I’ve learned to find the beauty in life
I can see it in the reflection of your eyes"
I loved the above lines dear Olivia. To feel the caress from warm and gentle eyes. A blessing. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[DarkPoet]

This is so deep,true and relatable,sometimes we get so caught up with ourselves that we don't see how our actions hurt those we love,and its not even intentional. I love that the writer has learn to do things because of the people in the writer's life.