The love story of John.
Realize I'm single. Brush crumbs off belly and quicksave fallout. Find shirt that's between tool and playboy. Two pairs of jeans. Dad style and tighter than a singlet. Squeeze pants on after all, girls check out booty too right? Drive to mall. 90s music all the way. Get out of rusty SUV. Game on. Just hitting the usual spots. Making sure to browse extra long for longer time on the game field. See attractive girl. 7/10. Instincts kick in. I am now an impressive lion, majestic and handsome. Casually stroll over like the leader of the Serengeti. Totally got this. One word entrance "hey". If I were any cooler it'd be snowing inside. Girl looks surprised " oh hey". Can tell she's attracted to me. Small talk to learn what I'm dealing with. Start getting more personal, talking about her emotions. Showing her I'm a nice guy and confident. Couldn't be going any better. She gets distracted by a tug on her arm. Look down. Some small kid reaching out with his hand. She digs in her purse and hands him a toy car. Dang! She's got a kid? Not sure if I'm mature enough to handle being a step dad. Transition back to small talk. She admits she's a mother. Tells me she has kids. More than one!? Remembered my lazy addictions I realize this is too much responsibility in my life. Going for the friend zone now. Looking for other kids now. See another by the fountain. One is climbing into an unmanned cart. Mind starts racing. How many could there be? Start to close off conversation. "Have to go do something. . ." backing up. "But you can't leave. They need a father!" She says, grabbing a hold of my arm. A father!? Oh crap what have I gotten myself into? Have to get away. More children begin appearing. See 15 now. More start coming out of the outlets heading my way. Jerk and break free of her grasp. Claw marks down my arm. She begins transforming. Pointed ears and yellow eyes. I stumble trying to get away. Start panicking. Hundreds of children now. They rush to block the exit. Kick over a dispenser, candy floods the floor. Children distracted, leap onto the candy. She thing screams "No! Grab him! Don't let him get away!" Pointing a hairy clawed arm at me. The pointed yellow eyes freezing my soul. The children look up with gumball stuffed mouths and begin sprinting towards me. Usain Bolt couldn't catch me. Rush into parking lot. Forgot where I parked. Luckily only rusty SUV like mine. Jump in and try to start. Engine clicks but doesn't turnover. Children are pouring out the door now. Roaring from the she thing coming from inside. Engine turns over. Pedal to the floor all the way home. Get inside. No beer, grab old mtn dew instead. Unpause fallout, begin gaming hardcore. Facebook alert on my phone. One new message. Check it. Cute girl, looks familiar. 'You can never hide from us, we will find you' delete Facebook. Delete phone with hammer, thoroughly. Never question single status. Go on later to find many like self who experienced the same thing. Start squad in charge of saving people from the same fate. Make a movie. Make a sequel. Billionaire.
-the end
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Read Request
My Library
Subscribe
Flag Writing