Time and time again

Malory has always been guarded, so when sudden feelings appear towards the demon she works with, she struggles with how to deal with them.

Malory pulled her knees to her chest, watching as the rain poured outside her bedroom window. The forest skirting the edge of her family’s property was listless, with no sign of activity and the sound of the water pounding on the roof echoed through the empty house. This was where her family had once lived. Back when it was safe to be this close to a forest, before the existence of otherworldly creatures became known to the general populace. 

Malory had been eight when her parents had decided it would be safer to live in the suburbs, they had packed up nearly everything, leaving just the furniture, deciding not to sell the house, so it could be used for vacations later in life. Those vacations had never happened though. It was never safe enough to come back, not as a family. Not with the horror lurking in the shadowy tree's.

When she had become old enough, Mal found herself coming here when she needed time away. She'd bought pots and pans and spare blankets to replace the moth eaten ones in the linen closet. She'd loaded her trunk with logs for the fireplace and drove out into the middle of the Virginia woods with her grandmother’s key in hand. 

When she'd arrived it had looked almost exactly the same as it did the day they left. Granted the grass now reached her knees, ivy crept up the sides of the building and cobwebs had collected in nearly every nook and cranny, but she didn't mind, the place held and air of peace. It felt timeless to her, and as she unlocked the front door she was overcome with a feeling that she was home, something that had been missing from her life for many years. 

That had been seven years ago. Now she was twenty-five, and hiding from feelings she wasn't sure how to deal with. The first time she had come, she was running away from pain and a broken heart. Malory thought she'd never come back for that reason, but she found herself repeating the process now. 

Usually she was so strong, she survived on one night stands and keeping even those closest to her out of her personal life. She stayed away from people when she could, and took her anger out on those who needed to be killed. She liked it that way. Shed liked being alone and away from everyone. So why was it that a demon had her falling to pieces? 

Was it the say he smiled at her? Or was it how he held her while she slept, making her feel safe in a world filled with danger. She couldn't tell if it was his laugh, or how dedicated he was to his work. Or how would put aside his nature and do little things to make her smile, like buying her flowers when she was feeling down. Whatever the reason, he had managed to work his way into her small, caged heart. 

Mal shivered, looking over her shoulder towards the dying fire. She wandered over, tugging another log from the stack next to the mantle and tossing it in, watching as the sparks scattered, the flames slowly engulfing the new piece of wood. She briefly wondered what it would feel like to be said log. How it would feel to be pulled in by the searing heat until she was numb and gone. 

Shaking her head she turned away, pulling a thick wool blanket from a pile on the couch and making her way out of the room and down the stairs. Wrapping the blanket around her shoulders, she slid her feet into her boots and walked out the front door and out from under the awning protecting her from the rain. The icy droplets plummeted into her hair, making their way down her neck and face.

The forest ahead beckoned, calling her forward into its foggy embrace. Begging her hide away from the world, beneath the think foliage. Soggy leaves squished below her boots with each step. And the deeper she followed the path she used to take as a child, the more she wondered why she couldn't accept what Damon had said to her. 

Her surroundings faded from her vision as she played the scene out in her mind once more. They were in a cheap motel room. The white carpet muddy from a finished hunt, a bad painting of a tin man staring at her from the wall. Cars whizzing past could be heard from the street outside, and the scent of cigarette smoke filled her nose with each breath.

“What did you mean......back there? " She'd asked, looking up at Damon from her spot on the thread bare couch.

“What d'ya mean, babe?" He cocked a brow at her, his violet eyes locking onto hers like they always did when the two spoke.

“Back when Cameron asked if you were my new boyfriend..." She trailed off, tucking a loose piece of hair behind her ear, "You said, that you could be. What did you mean by that?" her eyes flicking to her lap. He was silent for a moment, and she had the feeling she should have kept her mouth shut. That she should have pretended that it was him just f*****g around, as usual. 

"I meant what I said, Malory. I could be, but I'm not." He sounded so calm, like this was normal. Pulling herself to her feet she walked over to the tall demon, forcing herself to look him in the eye.

“Alright. But, what do you want to be?" she paused a moment, searching his eyes for something, anything that would tell her the truth. "To me, that is." 

“I don’t really care, Mal." He shrugged.

“What does that mean? How can you not care? “Frustration began to build in her, as he dug her nails into her palms. Didn't he realize how hard this was for her.

“I just don’t. I want to be your friend, associate, f**k buddy, and boyfriend. I don’t care which one." Once again he looked as though this was completely normal to him. She'd just shaken her head. 

“Well...." stopping, she took a deep breath, steadying her nerves. “Damon, if you had a choice, which one would you rather be? “She prayed he would give her a straight answer, just this once.

  " I don’t have a preference, Malory. I don’t care, do you? “She could see the frustration in his eyes. Biting her lip she looked away. She didn't want games. Not right now. Right now she wanted straight answers, she wanted the truth. No more silly demon riddles.

“Yes, Damon. I do have a preference. But I... I can’t play games with you. Not now, not about this. When you've made up your mind, come find me, but I can’t be around you right now." That had been the end of the conversation. She'd grabbed her bag off the bed and walked out, climbing in her car and driving away as quickly as she could.

The memory began to fade, and as it did her surrounding came back to her. The rain had stopped, the forest was still. She looked around, tugging her blanket around her protectively. Turning slowly, she was met by a large tree. The trunk twisted and dying. She knew this tree, this was where she'd come when Cameron had died. This was where she'd cried and begged for the pain to stop. And this was where she found herself sitting. Her legs hugged against her chest as she buried her face in her knees and cried. 

Author's Note

Just tell me what you think!
And ignore my grammar, please!