The Extraneous Thief: Vienna Diamond

A Story by Abishai100

A dizzy vigilante-thief named Sparrow squares against the more dashing diamond-pirate DarkStar in a blood-diamond Vienna debate.

A funny diamond-heist parody in Europe inspired by the iconic Avary film, Killing Zoe.

----

====

Vienna (Austria) is such a lovely place in Europe. It's the site of our double-heist fable about two very different thieves, one working against the diamond corruption created by Euro-barons trafficking in blood-diamonds or 'conflict diamonds' from South Africa, used to finance terrorism, a dashing pirate named DarkStar. The other thief is an average costumed self-proclaimed vigilante, a modern-day Robin Hood of sorts, who just wants to add some Euro-spice to this tale about diamond movements creating strange tides in Austria today. Follow along!

INTERPOL: Blood-diamond traffic is a serious problem in the modern diamond market, and agents work against threads.

The 'affable' average-guy thief is Amlan Satan who calls himself the Sparrow. Sparrow likes dressing up in strange costumes and masks for his diamond heists in Europe. He's concerned about the gem traffic from South Africa leading to diamond corruption linked to terrorism, just like DarkStar. However, Sparrow wants to add some theatrical 'spice' to this sort of work, so that barons creating African traffic into Europe (and North America too) are revealed to be somewhat deadly 'agents' of capitalism subversion! Amlan/Sparrow is a real nerd.

AMLAN/SPARROW: I don't want to get in the way of the dashing DarkStar, and I'll be wearing my own designed costume!

Amlan/Sparrow likes reading neo-classical Austrian comics like ASH, and he likes to think of himself as Robin Hood, helping Europe clean up some diamond corruption connected to conflict-stones traffic. He likes to add theatrical spice to his diamond heists so that this modern problem of blood-diamond news is reading like an adventure-story rather than a tale of great capitalism omens!

Sparrow has his own Net-blog in which he reveals various adventurous supeheroics as representative of a modern focus on the drive and imagination behind diamond infiltration that will go against the rising tide of blood-diamond matrices that threaten today's capitalism imagination!

Meanwhile, DarkStar has taken the Vienna Rail to the Austrian Bank, Erste, the same place where Sparrow (Amlan Satan) will perform his same time-period diamond heist. DarkStar will seduce the attractive bank manager Esha into thinking that he's performing some media stunt by taking photos of the Euro-baron Emil Kuyt's diamonds in his safe-box in the Erste Bank, diamonds which are actually blood-diamonds.

DARKSTAR: I won't let any strange vigilante antics performed by the weird Sparrow to interfere in my lovely plan.

BANK MANAGER: We're rather proud of our institution and the incredible architecture boasting gem-securities.

The inside of the Erste Bank in Vienna (Austria) reminds a person of a great theme-park or resort-like arena. The amenities and design leave nothing to be desired! It's a bank of great commercial promise and architectural splendor, so both Sparrow and DarkStar will have to be rather handsome in their daring feat with this diamond-heist.

BANK MANAGER: We're expecting two customers today in our Erste Bank, Dany Satan and Rude Makaay.

Dany is actually Sparrow, and Rude is actually DarkStar. Rude shows up at the bank first in a costume and mask and holding a magnificent toy water-uzi and explains to the attractive bank manager Esha that he's an artist who wants to take Polaroids of Emil Kuyt's diamonds in his safe-box for the newspapers. Esha is impressed, since Rude ('DarkStar') explains he's to deposit his own (fake) diamonds that day in the safe-box neighboring the one belonging to Kuyt. Esha is admittedly swept away by the daring and dash of this new Erste customer in her awesome banking complex.

Soon thereafter, Dany ('Sparrow') shows up in what seems to be some kind of Middle Eastern desert-nomad costume and head-gear, explaining he's an 'Arabian prince' who just wants to deposit some diamonds in a safe-box near the one owned by the renowned Euro-baron Emil Kuyt. He's told that a new customer named Rude is currently in that safe-box area doing some media-work with the bank manager Esha and must wait his turn to enter the safe-box area and has to wait in the lounge!

When Dany/Sparrow is finally escorted into the vault-room area with the safe-boxes, he's told by the escorting male manager and guardsman that the safe-box belonging to Emil Kuyt has already been photographed by a theatrical new customer (Rude). Sparrow immediately recognizes that the thief DarkStar must've been Rude and most likely has already switched some fake diamonds with the ones owned by Kuyt from Kuyt's safe-box. Sparrow decides to ask the manager if he can take a look at Emil Kuyt's diamond safe-box under supervision, just to get an idea of what they look like. While looking inside the safe-box, Sparrow places in the Kuyt safe-box a few diamonds which are clearly fake ones, unlike the fakes DarkStar (Rude) placed in the Kuyt box just earlier which are much more difficult to identity as fakes!

ESHA: I performed the necessary media operations for the new patron Rude, who was very dashing; we've decided to date.

The toy water-uzi Rude (DarkStar) brought with him for his own more media-savvy diamond heist was actually filled with corrosive HCL acid. He'd left the water-gun in the safe-box area for the bank personnel to present to another mysterious customer who he's told will come into the bank to also likely deposit diamonds in the safe-box area near the Kuyt box. When the male manager and guardsman servicing Sparrow (Dany/Amlan) think that Dany is in fact this 'mystery-man' customer, they ask him if he knows something about this fancy colorful toy-gun the earlier new customer/patron Rude (DarkStar) has left behind! Sparrow realizes DarkStar is trying to juke him and humorously tells the manager/guardsman, "I guess this customer is some kind of rival of my own gem-enterprise in Vienna and has likely filled his gun with some kind of acid!"

Sparrow ('Dany') leaves the bank that day after dumping those few very clearly fake diamonds in the safe-box of Emil Kuyt at Erste Bank. He hops onto the Vienna metro and makes his way to the airport to escape Austria immediately. He then drops a letter to Interpol claiming, "When Baron Kuyt inspects his safe-box gems at Erste Bank with TV-cameras, he'll be infuriated by some rather loud gem-corruption deformity!" You see, folks, Sparrow (Amlan Satan) intended to perform a more 'vigilante' like diamond-heist action by exposing to the media that Kuyt is somehow suddenly immersed in some rather serious European 'depression' before he fled on the Vienna subway!