Simon/Simon: Cheerleader(s) Dr.

A Story by Abishai100

The two great American crime-detectives for hire (Simon and Simon) tackle a homegrown terrorist ('Jem') who threatens Seatle cheerleader(s) diamond(s).

I'm signing off with a football-heroics tale fanfiction inspired by Simon & Simon.

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Seattle (Washington) is where the two iconic American crime-detectives for hire named Simon and Simon are working to resolve a very symbolic case for US history involving threats to the celebrated gorgeous Seahawks (football) cheerleader(s).

SIMON: We're 'nerdists' of American civilization, but this case gives me goosebumps, buddy!
SIMON: No fooling; the threats to the Seahawks cheerleader(s) really symbolizes our 'quest' for justice.

Now, Simon and Simon are quite intelligent crime-detectives for hire working in modern-day Seattle and are consenting to play this 'dark' game of chess-wits with their newest adversary, a homegrown American terrorist named 'Jem' who wants to pose this anti-society threat to the Seahawks cheerleader(s), requiring Simon and Simon to cast some extra-ordinary infiltration(s) intelligence(s).

Now, football in America is considered quite an important sport. It generates the most revenue(s), and Super Bowl ads/endorsements go through the figurative roof every year! In addition, college-football offers American audiences/fans/investors incredible images of very culturally-symbolic teams like Notre Dame Fighting Irish and Miami Hurricanes national limelight(s). While soccer is the most dominant marketed/profitable/broadcast sport on the global stage, with the World Cup soccer tourney being the 'highlight' of international sports after the Olympics, American football is the most ornamented national-cultural spotlighted sports-social activity in America.

After 9/11, when anti-Western terrorists destroyed the commerce-symbolic World Trade Center (NYC) with hijacked crashed passenger airplanes, the world became 'on-edge' about the quality of new millennium angst towards American culture/capitalism. This however didn't disturb the 'pageantry' of American football media and Super Bowl ad-presentations year-after-year. Nevertheless, perhaps 9/11 made Americans feel more 'quarantined' in their peculiar cultural preference(s) for American football!

The Seahawks of Seattle had already won the Super Bowl title in the new millennium and were considered a top-notch resurrected team since the days of Steve Largent in the 20th Century. This is why the homegrown terrorist 'Jem' wants to target the Seahawks cheerleader(s).

JEM: Super Bowl ads are capitalism-bias, and the Seahawks cheerleader(s) will become my 'dolls' of terror-dollar(s)!

SIMON: We'll stake-out the Seahawks home-games in the stadium parking-lot(s) before/after each game!

SIMON: I suspect our 'bad friend' Jem will show up in a kidnapping-van to scoop up one of the cheerleaders as prey.

When Jem showed up in a diamond-merchant van in the Seahawks stadium parking-lot before a game against the LA Rams, Simon and Simon correctly identified this terrorist-van and arrested the psychopath. He had fake diamonds in his van which he intended to use to lure one of the Seahawks cheerleaders into a ransom-game of post-9/11 era depression!

JEM: How'd you catch me, you rascals?
SIMON/SIMON: We thought you'd show-up at the pre-game parking lot(s).

JEM: You understand why I targeted the cheerleader(s)?
SIMON/SIMON: Perhaps you 'categorized' them as terrorism-Rapunzels?
JEM: Indeed, they are 'damsels' of the modern consumerism/media bias, detectives!

SIMON/SIMON: What do they have to do with 9/11, American psycho?
JEM: Super Bowl ads are synonymous with capitalism myopia.

SIMON/SIMON: American football continues to be a 'hallmark' of the national dream(s).
JEM: Yet, football remains a 'purely' American investment, no?
SIMON/SIMON: Well, it's soccer that generates more media outside America, of course.

JEM: So, you see that American football is rather...American.
SIMON/SIMON: So, you're targeting America for the Super Bowl capitalism detention(s)?
JEM: Precisely; these cheerleaders are Rapunzels of the Apocalypse.

SIMON/SIMON: We suppose you believe that you're a 'dragon' of interception(s)?
JEM: I'm the 'dragon' of sports-media piracy, detectives.

SIMON/SIMON: To rescue 'Rapunzel' from your fire(s), we endorse the 'liberty' of dollar(s).
JEM: What is the dollar?

SIMON/SIMON: It's the 'sword' against the fascism of dictated socialization!
JEM: I suppose then that your 'rescue' of the Seahawks cheerleader(s) was a 'portrait' of a crusade?
SIMON/SIMON: Indeed, our Seattle-deed was a 'sign' of the 'valor' of pure capitalism-chivalry.

With these American cheerleaders rescued from the clutches of this depressing American psycho (Jem), Simon and Simon cemented themselves as perfect 'messengers' of the liberties of new era media/consumerism activity directed to form the crucible of Western civilization capitalism (e.g., Super Bowl ads) dancing.