Just Remember Me

Just Remember Me

By Aki Kleist

I woke up in a hospital; last thing I remember is I was in the classroom at my school and then nothing, just suddenly darkness hit me. Next to my bed is my mother, in tears. I couldn’t understand why she is crying, I thought I only blacked out in exhaustion, but no. The doctor told me soon after I woke up.

It was cancer, not only it was cancer, but it was in the last stage of cancer. Meaning I’m dying, soon. I was shocked, so shocked I couldn’t believe it was happening. My life is just starting, yet it’s going to end soon, very soon. The doctor said I have three months left and gave me advice to stop school and spend time that is left with my family and friends.

And then I decided, I will spend one last month in school to say goodbye to my friends, classmates and teachers in my school, Mom and Dad agreed with me, and said to me that I can do almost anything as long as I don’t break any laws or anything.

It wasn’t much of a help to make me feel better, if anything it didn’t help at all. First few days were depressing, I kept thinking about it all day, like how it’s going to be like, dying I mean, then my homeroom teacher said to me that I shouldn’t waste time to think like that and enjoy what’s left of my life. 

Next day, I didn’t go to school, but instead spent time to look for something I could enjoy before I die. Then I realized something, things I always wanted to

try. Surfing and stuff like these. Flyboards, I saw them last year on YouTube and I kept thinking to myself that I want to try them. Now is the time.

Two weeks from now, I’m going to quit school, I wasn’t happy nor depressed about it, the whole time, all teachers didn’t give me any homework at all because of my situation and I realized one thing, I was beginning to fully enjoy my life, not because of that, but because I am dying. I thought to myself finally. I’m not going to die in silence; I want to die with a smile in my face and fully content about it. No! I AM going to die with a smile in my face.

I collected my courage and confessed my love for her. Her name is Akiza, she didn’t stand out or anything. In fact she is a normal girl. Since mid-through first year, I fell for her. I asked her if I could talk to her in private and all her friends instantly knew what I going to do, except for her. She was kinda surprised that I asked her that.

We talked and worked together few times before, so wasn’t really awkward that we talk time to time, but this time it was different. I confessed and said that it’s okay if she didn’t answer and I just wanted to get it out of my heart. My heart felt like it became lighter same time felt like it was removed from my body.

'Next day, she said to me that she also kinda had a thing for me and is willing to spend time with me. I was surprised, enough to make me feel like all my strength just left my body and just fell to my knees, she quitly tried to help me up, but I didn’t had enough strength to stand up again, so we were sitting down instead.

I turned to her and slowly approached her. She didn’t denied or tried to push me away, and that was our first kiss. We began to date every other day and my parents were happy that I wasn’t wasting time being depressed and found a girl I want to be with for the rest of my life. We spent time in the water, trying to learn the flyboard, surfing and messing around in the water. More than once our parents were with us, getting to know each other, talk about stuff and occasionally join the fun, but as days go by and the inevitable day comes closer and closer. 

We all began to get closer with each other. Then it happened, once again I blacked out, but this time it was more serious than the last time. The doctor told me I only had days left, four at most. Akiza began to get depressed and I told her what my former teacher told me. “Don’t waste time being depressed and enjoy what’s left of my life.”

She slowly began to smile again. I was signed out of the hospital few hours after that. Seemed like it was only the final sign before I die. I visited my friends and said that I was sorry that I didn’t spent enough time with them, but they said that it was best for me and my family to spent time with them.

We were on a beach, messing around as usual when it happened. First I felt like my body suddenly ran out of strength, I collapsed. Everybody quickly ran towards me, Akiza came first because she was the closest; everyone began to cry, while I was lying in the sand with my head on Akiza’s lap.

I looked at Akiza and she was crying with the words telling me not to go, but she knew that I’m going to die in manner of minutes. I looked at everyone. 

They were all in grief as they were watching me lying in the sand. As my body began to get colder, I told everyone, “Don’t cry, smile. Smile like every day you are with me. Every day.” I looked at Akiza and told her “Enjoy the rest of your life and when it’s your time, I’ll there. Waiting for you, until then love your life like you love me.” I kissed her forehead and smiled. At that point I felt warm and fuzzy feeling, and I could hear my last heartbeats. My heart stopped, but same time I never felt more alive than ever.

-Yuuta