Timeless Winter

Timeless Winter

A Story by Allison
"

A song-fiction based in the song Timeless Winter by Into Eternity.

"

"Scorched by winter’s wrath
I lay still in the night
This winter’s choking embrace
Leaves me with no will to fight
"

 

I give in; I give up; I surrender.

 

I’m burning. I’m suffocating. I’m freezing. I'm paralyzed with death's lips nearly against mine. 

 

I’m done. I give up. Take me. Take me now. The pain, the cold, will end.

 

Death is me. I am death. We are one. Winter is death. I am winter. Winter is here. Winter is there. I lay here dying and winter approaches.

 

The cold is surrounding me. I can’t see light. I can’t hear. I can only feel this. I feel this cold. I feel death. I feel winter.

 

I give in; I give up; I surrender.

 

"Timeless winter
Timeless winter"

 

This will never end, will it?

 

When I fall into nothing it will be nothing forever, right? I’ll be dead for eternity. This winter will never end.  What am I thinking? Is this nothing better than everything I had? It’s too late to go back now. My life is fleeing from me. This is the end. This is the end of my being. This is forever. I suppose, in that sense, it’s just the beginning of this timeless winter.

 

This will never end, will it?

 

"My heart decayed and deadened
By this ravenous winter
For see this end is frozen
Begins this timeless winter"

 

This isn't death. . . Is it?

 

This is so strange. Before this winter my heart felt like it was rotting; in this winter my heart feels like it’s decaying. There’s a huge difference. It hurt before. Rotting is painful, but decaying feels dead.

 

I feel dead. Am I dead? I know I’m dying, but have I reached the end? Is this what this winter is?

 

This can’t be the end. This isn’t right. This can’t be death. I still have consciousness! I want nothing! I want death! Not winter! I want the end and I want it now!

 

I’m frozen. Time isn't moving, I'm not moving, nothing is moving. I cold. I'm frozen in every sense of the word. Oh lord, this can’t be death. This isn’t right. This isn’t death. I know it’s not. I'm positive. Mostly. Reassurance. I need reassurance. Reassure me.

 

This isn’t death. . . Is it?

"Forever crimson
Warmth shrouds my body and soul
As two worlds collide
My being dwells within this empty black hole"

 

Oh, how utterly strange this is.

 

I’m positive I’ll feel this only once, but it seems to be lasting  forever.

 

Everything is oddly crimson, but nothing is crimson. I can’t see anything, but I don’t see simply nothing. I see red. It’s a quite impossible thing to describe and it’s here. I am the red. The red is everywhere, but I am still. I am. Do you understand me? I understand, but I don’t.

 

I’m warm, but I’m frozen. I’m warm and cold at the same time. This is strange. The world I lived in is meeting this new world in a collision of nothing. A massive explosion of nothing, but everything at once. I understand. I understand nothing. I have a hold on nothing. How can you hold nothing? I don’t know, but I am. I am nothing.

 

But I still have something. I still have this. What is this? I’m in this empty black hole I can only describe as nothing. It’s crushing, suffocating, drowning, burning, freezing, and coming to peace all at the same time.


Oh, how utterly strange this is.

"Death embraces me
destroying my sanity
Reaching for the light
Fading to darkness
This feeling of emptiness
The physical perish with sight"

 

I'm fading... fading ... fading.

 

I’m dying… or am I already dead? This winter, this being of nothing, this knowing of nothing, is driving me insane. It’s destroying my sanity. I’m loosing my hold on reality. Is this reality? How can something like this be real? Nothing is real.

 

I see this light… this light in the darkness. This crushing nothing could be described as darkness, but it’s not dark. It’s the absence of everything. But there is light. There is hope. There is my small amount of sanity have I have left. That’s fading. Everything is fading. Nothing is fading.

 

Do you follow me? Is this understandable? I’m on the way out. I’m so close to the end. These few minutes, seconds, years, whatever have lasted for all eternity in my mind. My sanity is the last thing to leave me.

 

And now I’m watching everything physical disappear with everything mental. Everything is fading to nothing. Not the nothing that is something, but the nothing that is nothing.
 

I'm fading... fading ... gone.

 

"Seamless never ending time
As I begin to quiver
I lay still with these crystals of cold
This lifeless body begins to wither"

 

It was only minutes that lasted forever in that mind. The forever blended together seamlessly in just a few minutes. It’s inexplicable, really. I was absorbed sitting here, holding my dearest friend as the lights in my friend’s eyes faded and finally weren’t there.

 

The light flickers out in a mind, the nothing takes over, and the decomposition of the cold body begins. It’s a mysterious, amazing event to watch take place.

 

It’s chilling, like the death is breathing on me, breathing wispy strands of the cold heat awaiting me. It’s like a whisper of the life that just ended; a simply complicated hint of that that’s there, of that that’s always been and always will be there.

 

It’s there, behind everyone’s lives, waiting, waiting...

 

I can’t wait to feel it’s cold embrace. I can’t wait to feel the timeless winter.

© 2009 Allison


Author's Note

Allison
I have this as a book on this site, but I'd like to enter this into competitions so I've made it into a story.

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I liked all the poems in between each paragraph. A story packed with emotional self destruction and questions. The only problem I had with this one is some words are repeated often. Mainly "nothing." Great story, it made me feel a little sad.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on June 21, 2009

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Allison
Allison

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