Purification

After a split up, realizations set in. Cleansing the soul for her benefit but especially mine.

As I sit, I reflect. What have I done? Things said.
For I feel from the heart but am silenced by the mind. I am safe in silence, no one can hear me here. My mind a prison, I am trapped in my thoughts. But unfair to you.

My world, my voice, my spirit you became.
My life, my energy, my love you obtained.
I understand now. Pain, frustration, sadness you experienced with me. Ego. Trapped in my beliefs, trapped in my arrogance, you suffered.

A thousand times I can apologize but undo the past, I cannot. The future. Smiles, happiness, bright lights. This I am confident for you. My hope, my inner knowing, no ego, no games, no false intentions.

My deepest desire lies in you. I was blinded by lust, confusion, by ego. I let go of you, to say fully would be a lie. Deep down I yearn for you.

To call us one, I may dream. A broken down man reformed to something worthy of your love once again, I strive in patience. For now only a dream I can close my eyes and live.

Time will tell. Whatever the outcome, my love for you will never die, only when I do. Then the next me will carry it on.