A VENUSUVIANN WINTER...

mental prose

A...Venusuvian Winter…

…Shards of yellow crystals

allows 3-D visuals…to be seen is…

Memories of lost abandonment….

They

…give meaning to the walk

///The gate that floats a vessel///

… Spiced up Cognac…

…Mingles with the spike of a Mickey…

The

…conflicting thoughts of intrusions…

..Of..

…Past inflictions…. Release paranoid delusions..

….loneliness…is a thing of deep space 9…

// Standing here….

***With a foot as big a Orion’s belt ***

…the elevated swish …the sounds …the sigh

.. Of..

///The non- existent criminal….Freezes ///

……….Membranes to deliver to Pluto…

..Spring time…

..Change the axis to a rational configuration….

…Disaster…

//Affliction of tender conduits//

..As Hollow as Jupiter’s massive insides ..

…Down goes the next wave~~~~~~~~~~~

… … … ..The numbness welcomed……

…..The incoherence of planetary movement…

///Winter does not last forever///

…Where the movement is tangible…

***Absolute***

And then

~~~There is the Venusuvian Winter~~~

///..Rigged..///..Unrelenting ..///

///…Devoid…of reason…///

…Thick Glaciers…

///Frost bitten barren….

//Mentally closed…..

~~Sitting at the bar

~~Awaiting a 3finger neat…

~~Watching passersby…

…Winter on a Stool…

BABy©2010

Reviews

[K.C. Zbryk]

i cant see the photos, but this poem is amazing. the whole piece has the surreal feeling of a dream, and demands multiple reads. Brilliant use of the format as well

[MS. BABy]

thank u so much everyone for the encouragement that I am receiving here, Rikkevi, November Gold Cassiopia Summer,InYrdreams,Coyote, I am so thankful that I listened to a fellow writer and came to this site, this is so good for me and it helps me to stay up at night, lol I am a night writer on the JOB...and this is my haven,...thank u so much

[Rikkevi Rue]

ingeniously constructed reflective analogy of the "universe of ones" parallel to the "universe" of our solar system. Draws great impetus and meaning from the long earthling tradition of personifying the heavenly bodies with particular attributes, while effectively depicting both the dark and light aspect of real personality. There is great ORIGINALITY in this work.

[Cassiopia Summers]

I agree with November Gold. This piece was more intense than usual. The structure added that flair that makes you have to keep reading. Great meaning and flow as well. Good work.

[November Gold]

The structure added an element of intensity for me, the pics were perfect and the descriptive words were powerful. I felt like you were describing someone I know. ;)

[Becky C Strukamp]

Loved the photos and the poem. Very interesting structure.

[Coyote Poetry]

Amazing photos and words. I could read this poem many times. You can make the language dance and make sense. Thank you for this outstanding poem.
"~~~There is the Venusuvian Winter~~~
///..Rigged..///..Unrelenting ..///
///…Devoid…of reason…///"
Coyote

[Rene Velez]

it reads like a spontaneous free verse I can see on stage, nice wordplay and great images, the end had me picturing a beautiful woman holding a nice cold drink on the rocks...