Escape me while you can

I'm sorry for acting the way I do.

Truth be told,

I might as well be considered a psychotic b***h.

I'm a lunatic and a ticking time bomb.

I can't help but be needy.

I can't help but be pushy.

I can't help that I let people in too quickly.

I can't help how I feel.

I can't stop my brain from over processing everything.

I can't help but hide from everyone.

I'm sorry.

I'm not good enough for anyone.

Or for anything.

I can't turn off my thoughts and my emotions.

Oh how I wish I could.

Some might call me anti-social.

Some might say it's my choice.

Little do people know, I try.

I try to talk to people.

But it leaves me forcing a fake smile and acting happy.

Half the time I believe it.

Maybe if I trick myself enough, I'll believe I'm actually happy?

No, doubtful.

Because everything I shoved back, forces its way up.

And if I could have more confidence, more self-esteem, maybe i'll feel better.

But that's doubtful as well.

I'm literally good for nothing, fat, and a lazy f**k.

I'm sorry for even being in anyone's lives...

I truly am sorry for cursing you with my presence.

But, I'm here to stay because it's not like I have courage to do s**t.

I'm giving you the option to leave now while you can.

And when you leave, don't look back.

I don't want to hurt anyone with my depressive states, my bitchy moods,

Or my anti-socialness.