Empty Eyes

A Poem by TannerslostintheHedges

I really feel like everybody should spare their efforts in cheering me up.

The sun is out. I feel the heat, the little bit that there is.

The rays aren't strong enough, I feel cold.

Jumping out of windows, jumping off of truck steps

while the drivers foot steps, on the gas pedal.

it is often that my tendencies are seen as suicidal,

we're comparable, pain is vital to our survival.

No attention needed, there are no malicious thoughts in this empty silo.

No need for gifts or trips of extravagance as there is no happiness in this empty smile.

Don't play pretend with me, or pretend I do not see.

I have empty eyes due to all I've seen, I have empty eyes from what you are showing me.

The past is the past, I look over my shoulder, glower at the world,

never will I turn my back.

Forgive never forget,

live never lie, this world is to small too fill these empty eyes.

© 2018 TannerslostintheHedges

Author's Note

What do you think of the dialogue? How can I improve my writing? Leave a helpful comment!

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Reviews

Darqu3ss3

I could relate with this poem, the way you write is amazing as you get all the emotions to come through, I might still be a bit new to writing but I know everyone has their own way of writing, so I think that the way you write shouldn’t changed unless you yourself find a different way that suits you.

Posted 6 Years Ago

Randolph

Honestly? Don't you DARE dick with that flow. This is beautifully painted. If anything, just keep after it. I'd love to hear a different tone. Just for comparison. Some people get stuck in a perspective. Nothing at all wrong with that, though. If that's the canvas you've been gifted, have at it. If, however, you feel a tug in another direction, even just for s***s and giggles, head there. I am one of those idiots who just loans my pen to whatever critter wants to play with it. The voice is similar, but the subject is ever surprising to me. Whatever your "method" (I extra special despise that word. It's more tedious than I am), run with it. I am wicked impressed. Cheers.