Please Stop

Just some thought I had on my mind <3

I've been lying to myself my whole life

Telling myself in the mirror that I'm beautiful even tho my mind says different

Telling myself I'll be able to stop but the next day I'm on the Bathroom floor with my blade in my hand

I shouldn't be Proud

I shouldn't be proud each time I see blood dripping down my Thigh

I shouldn't be Proud when I see my cuts get deeper each day almost to the point where I die

I'm scared to talk

Scared to say my feelings out loud because I got told that my mouth is like a waterfall

I used to be proud of how I talked but now I just worry If I don't annoy people with the sounds that I make overall

My body is exhausted 

My sleep schedule got destroyed by my sleepless nights and my panic attacks that I have

My Body hurts and my legs slowly give up, my arms don't wanna move anymore and my eyes are always shut

I shouldn't listen

I get told every day that I need to stay but my mind tells me that the date comes closer and I feel like I need to obey

I hate the little voice that tells me to finally make the move, I'm just scared and worried what If i don't succes? Will I be ever in the right mood?

Please Stop

I'm scared of each step I make, If I do the wrong one I may be 6 feet underground and never be awake

Someone tell the voices to Stop screaming, I can't handle Life anymore and I wish I could be just dreaming

Author's Note

Please ignore my spelling <3