past

past

 

The echoed words on the walls,

The mirror in the car

Making you see the past me

The one who is not here

 

The past that is death

That is faithed not to be here instead

Restless souls and memories

From family members which live on

 

The empty space they leave in their place

The place you put aside in your hearth

Which was never filled with happiness

But all with horrible fears

 

The car driver looks in front

There is future me

All alone

That´s the only thing to be seen

Reviews

[compositionc]

Kind of sad, yet strong. The lines seem a bit unconnected, a little loose, vague. Nicely penned.

[Daniel Thomas Andrew Da..]

Too vague in unconnected sentences - not clear enough to create solid ideas - philosophical, too negative for my personal style. Interesting enough though. Daniel

[nevermindfan1991]

Very ominous and solemn but well written poem. It flowed pretty well and you were able to express the feeling of being terrified and alone very clearly. I enjoyed reading this and I'm glad you shared. Great Job!

[Jeremy Baker]

Interesting concept - liked it!

[TheElfPrincess]

A very sad, strong poem. The emotions were fresh and well written, the lines were all very well written. Great piece.

[Vinod Kumar U K]

Nice Rotation.......Good write

[BrynnaW.]

:o wow... Sad and powerful... I was being swept away by the emotions. Great job!! Keep on writing! These poems are amazing!!

[Rae]

It's a very delicate piece. I like that in a poem. Keep writing!!

[amdc101]

This is very full of feeling and very powerful. Great job and keep writing!

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

Has a powerful feeling this one :)