A friend

I'm sorry friend
I can not be,
can not be the one you want me to be
Can't be the words you whispered in my ear

If i wanted to be your loved one,
you asked it so sincere,
many words just can't grasp
the emotions, the feelings, such a mess


Sorry friend,
I can't be,
I can't be your lover
I'm not the one you wanted to see.

I'm sorry friend
I give you hope,
that some day a sun will rise,
Just like our love.

I'm sorry friend
i mean it sincere,
Because I can't answer your love
and it's hurting you
you're no longer a friend of me

Reviews

[Kiri Nells]

I think you have a good poem-- in the making. I'd like to see some better vocabulary and cleverly put together phraseology. Not all poems call for it, but 99% do. This poem, unfortunately is not purposely simple, so it could be stronger with it's emotionally striking words. Also, if you enter a draft like this one, you should mention that it's only a draft. If it's not a draft, think about fixing some of the grammar issues so that we can all see you care enough about your poetry to type it correctly. I'm sorry about the harshness, I'm simply too sick of seeing all these little, easy-to-fix problems in poetry.
Other than the few issues, I hope you continue your journey as a poet and I wish you the best as you try to improve your work in this art.

Thank you for sharing,
Kiri

95/100

[Siddharth T]

Great job! I think a little bit more expressiveness, and this is one perfect poem!

love it very much though..

[Vinod Kumar U K]

Late confession and appology nice job........

[TheElfPrincess]

A very interesting, flowing poem. I enjoyed reading it very much. Perhaps a bit more emotion and then It'd be perfect.

[prodicallife]

Black the flow is great, i loved the way you scripted it. Only thing you could have been a bit more deeper with your thoughts a bit more easy and emotions could have been slightly more compact.

You write great

Keep up the good work

Regards
PRODICAL

[I Cast a Shadow]

Wow. So from the heart. I believe it more than a lot more of your poems. It's solid and tragic. Beautiful.

[Thea]

Aw...This really made me think about my past...Haha! Nicely done but you can improve...I mean, I know you can do better than this! But this poem is great... :)))

[amdc101]

Nicely done.

[Rae]

Wow. Good write. Keep writing!!

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

Sad, enjoyed vastly!!