Drowning in Sin

Drowning in Sin

A Poem by WynterPhoenix

A victim in a world

no longer reprieved.

Solitary confinement,

spit upon and deceived.

When society controls the standards,

who am I left to be?

A lost soul, drowning

in a greedy sea.

Violent behavior,

condemning the weak.

Strength has kept me living

in a land I didn’t seek.

An unsub corrects my faults,

when ignoring them I fail.

A sin remembered always,

convicting me to Hell.

A permanent alibi

proved worthy of a lie.

The audience waits patiently,

watching as I die.

A victim in a world

no longer reprieved.

Solitary confinement,

spit upon and deceived.

When society controls the standards,

who am I left to be?

A lost soul, drowning

in a greedy sea.

© 2011 WynterPhoenix


Author's Note

WynterPhoenix
Not my best. I'm not really in a writing mood lately, and still debating on whether or not I should give up. This poem is just a few thoughts I'm having today. I'm not sure if it will make sense to anyone, but I understand where it's coming from so I'm happy with it.

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Sounds a lot like something i would write, a common concept of mine. The struggle to be who you are and what you want to be while everyone else is saying and wanting otherwise. People are greedy, narrowminded, maliceful, and ignorant, so how can someone with a different way of thinking and feeling not feel confined and alone? People always follow the crowds and b***h at others for not doing the same, nobody gives a s**t about owning and respecting themselves. This greedy sea we call life will just keep on churning, we can only pray for those who try to float above it all.
Favoriting. Oh and please dont give up writing, dont let other people get you down. You are a writer, its who you are, dont let this hellish world kill it. You are a good writer, not everyone may agree, but does that really matter? Not everyone will have the same opinion, and not everyone is able to fully understand appreciate art. And even if you do give up writing for a period of time, you will always come back to it. Its just who you are. So take a stand and push back at those who try to oppress you. What you need is some new inspiration and possibly a style change, and this poem proves it. Look at this poem and many of your recent ones, they are growing in difference from your usual stuff. I think you are just reaching a point in which you are on the brink of a change and not recognizing it. But do not let it fool you into giving up. Giving up will change nothing, and while fighting back wont guaruntee anything, at the very least you go down on your back.

"Falling on your feet is better than falling on your knees"

Posted 12 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I shall not conform, I will walk my own path and beat my own drum, or I will become a lost soul drowning in a greedy sea. The path I choose may not be the easiest but it will be the right one in the end. Well penned.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

"When society controls the standards, who am I left to be? A lost soul, drowning in a greedy sea," I love those lines. I get where you are coming from with this also, this is fantastic please don't give up because it would be a tragedy if you did.
I know what you mean I haven't been the mood for writing either lately but I think its because I have had too much on my mind lately that I haven't got any room in my thoughts for my writing right now. I am just waiting for the smoke to clear. I hope that whatever it is that has put you out of the mood for writing goes away soon.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sounds a lot like something i would write, a common concept of mine. The struggle to be who you are and what you want to be while everyone else is saying and wanting otherwise. People are greedy, narrowminded, maliceful, and ignorant, so how can someone with a different way of thinking and feeling not feel confined and alone? People always follow the crowds and b***h at others for not doing the same, nobody gives a s**t about owning and respecting themselves. This greedy sea we call life will just keep on churning, we can only pray for those who try to float above it all.
Favoriting. Oh and please dont give up writing, dont let other people get you down. You are a writer, its who you are, dont let this hellish world kill it. You are a good writer, not everyone may agree, but does that really matter? Not everyone will have the same opinion, and not everyone is able to fully understand appreciate art. And even if you do give up writing for a period of time, you will always come back to it. Its just who you are. So take a stand and push back at those who try to oppress you. What you need is some new inspiration and possibly a style change, and this poem proves it. Look at this poem and many of your recent ones, they are growing in difference from your usual stuff. I think you are just reaching a point in which you are on the brink of a change and not recognizing it. But do not let it fool you into giving up. Giving up will change nothing, and while fighting back wont guaruntee anything, at the very least you go down on your back.

"Falling on your feet is better than falling on your knees"

Posted 12 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.


2
next Next Page
last Last Page
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

687 Views
13 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on October 26, 2011
Last Updated on October 26, 2011

Author

WynterPhoenix
WynterPhoenix

Asgard, TN



About
To my friends, Don't worry about my leaving this site. I might pop in every now and then, when I have the time but, for the first time...I'm all right. Things are different. My life is changing and.. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..