Ruined

I was really depressed when I wrote this one. It is really sad for me.

Romance novels have ruined me,

But not in the way you would think.

They didn’t kill my innocent belief in the Stork.

They didn’t train me to be dependent or weak.

But they ruined me all the same.

 

They showed me love.

That true love that fairy tales describe.

They showed me the rewards

Given to people who are good and strong.

They showed me the ultimate happy ending.

 

It is a happy ending I crave.

A longing to have someone love me that much.

A longing to have someone I love that much.

A wish to be happy.

A wish to never be alone.

 

But I’ll never get that.

The world is too vast and the people to many.

How can I find my soul mate while locked in this cage?

How can I search for my love when the chains are unbreakable?

And, if I did find him, what then?

 

‘Give him your heart.’

I can’t.

It is torn and bleeding and battered.

 

‘Give him your mind.’

I can’t.

It is fragmented and poisoned.

 

‘Give him your soul.’

I can’t.

It was stolen and only an aching hole remains.

 

All I have is my beloved facade.

My beautiful lie.

My carefully crafted mask that no one notices.

Beneath it there is nothing,

But cold, white walls with no life or color.

 

White like hospital rooms.

White like the light that hurts my eyes.

White like the hope that is always dashed.

 

I am truly ruined.

Never could I be content with someone I just like a lot.

But true love would never find me.

You can’t have a soul mate

If you do not have a soul.

Author's Note

I hope you like it, even if it is depressing.

Reviews

[A.r. Bazian]

I LOVED IT BRIT!
you have no idea!
well... lets talk literature...
the structure is well crafted
diction is very descriptive and strong
feelings are amazingly revolting
and the pictures are drawn clear!
now... lets talk, as friends...
my friend, the feeling, the confession, and the bravery show you have a soul!
its blurry when you're looking outside in... because of how many times you've been hurt!
you're heart is white... which is a saying we have in my part of the world indicating the loving potential of a person and how warmhearted they r! i believe you say... a heart of gold!
and yes... you do have a heart of gold!
the hollowness and the emptiness you feel inside are what show the loving soul that is longing for love... and if you do not have a soul... you can never long for love!
and you do long for love... thus, you do have soul!
look deeply into your heart...
its the only way to find the light!
and you have plenty of light!

be well
love and respect

[Joseph - Michael]

No, I don't like it, in fact, I f*****g love this! I mean, everything you've written are so true, I mean, people tend to get "ruined" after they learn so many things about love where they thought they once knew, but they were wrong and had to find out like that. Yeah, so sad, so depressing, but it's the truth that need to be told one way or another...

Anyway, it's a really great piece you've created and you probably just saved several (the readers) lives from knowing not to get ruined. It's a bit too late for me, but there's still a hope for the others...

[Brie]

I like this. You made your feelings clear, creatively. Very good poem!
I hope you feel better, if you're not already.
-Brie

[Patient Poet (Yos)]

I like it :). . . I can understand your feeling
Yos