Fate

love s endless i don't know

Countless breaths escape my mouth

as i skip and run up the stairs

to the rooftop

that's all on my own mind

At the top I calm my breath

trying not to panic

keep a level head

sliding my hand around the cold metal knob

twisting it slowly

then enter the windy roof

i see you there climbing over the rail

when I shout stop!

you turn around in a quick motion

tears filling your eyes and dropping to the unknown beneath

i take a step closer

you flinch to my decision you shake your head 

quickening your movements

i catch you by the arm as you make the jump

dragging you to the other side to be safe

you weep out and repeat why? over and over again

All i could do was listen and do nothing

my heart breaks when learning you have no more reason to live

i just wanted you to know that I only live for you alone

........that.........was.........all.............

years pass by and I return to the exact spot and lay down the flowers 

the very grave where I had let you die when I wasn't looking

everyone doesn't care but I live for your life only and yet I don't feel like i'm alive anymore

Author's Note

tell me your pinions please love to read about what you say don't worry you can criticize

Reviews

[Richard Helbert]

i liked this very much, i can identify with the words and the tone i think its honest and sincere and deserves to be read

[CrimsonShinigami]

Thank you very much

[Virtue]

Though you may have a few grammar mistakes, the stunning flow that compels you to read on is just captivating and haunting. I feel that you could have shortened a few phrases, and maybe adjusted the wording of a few others. When you say "twisting it slowly then enter the windy roof" it may sound a bit better to replace "then" with "I." Also with "I see you there climbing over the rail" maybe try something to the affect of "only to see you climbing over the rail." That's my personal opinion, and it may just be your style of writing, no offense meant. But regardless, it is a masterpiece you should be proud with. :)

[CrimsonShinigami]

thank you very much I appreciate the honest opinions i'll remember that when I write something next time

[Virtue]

You're welcome.

[Lola_Bee]

wow this is beautiful and sad at the same time. each line flows beautifully

[CrimsonShinigami]

Thank you very much