Break the Veil

The tip of the tongue betrays

when day bleeds into night

and mind is turned to murky swamp

By the blur of a shared buzz

When hands speak volumes

and lips remain parted in silence

Breaking the holy veil only to utter

such damning evidence,

I find myself lost in the fading light.

I question not from where this flower grows

Nor what thorns may adorn its moss-colored spine

Only grasp it close in warm surrender

Blessed by dark and hidden intentions

Reviews

[H L Rose]

I often think it’s hard to make free-verse flow so well, but you’ve done a great job.

You have many intriguing lines that make me stop to ponder and analyze. The ones that really make me think are,

“Such damning evidence”
And
“I question not from where this flower grows”
And
“Blessed by dark and hidden intentions”

You have built so many lines that are beautiful simply on their own, and your word choice is great. In the second line of the first stanza, I like your choice of the word “bleed” and in the second line of the third stanza, I liked you choice of “moss-colored”.

I think you’ve written this very well.