One sexually impetuous act by me doesn't make me a s**t, irretrievably!A Poem by COLLYMORESelf-explanatory.
By Stanley Collymore
Yes, I was foolhardy to do what I did; but just as there was no coercion on my sexual lover's part to, at any cost, bed me there likewise was no calculatedly cunning conspiracy on my own either to obviously ensure that he did and perfectly frankly and honestly what evidently happened between us consensually really came about both naturally and spontaneously. True to say I had long promised myself that I would really, never sexually involve myself heterosexually, for really it is what I unquestionably am, with any member of the male sex until I was over 18 and even then it would just be with somebody I basically knew personally, crucially liked or simply really deeply cared for reciprocally, was evidently, a legally consenting adult; and who were he to be even truly in love with me, nevertheless really respected me sufficiently to sensibly take, my well-known and cherished feelings into his fullest consideration before we crucially actually indulged consensually in mutually compliant adult coition. Fully confident in myself that this was the way in which I would consciously and willingly lose my virginity, I consequently didn't worry or even think about sex unduly; as there was no real need or actually any reason to as I was just 16, quite clearly, still at school, and earnestly planning on subsequently going on to university. Simply, really the first person effectively amongst any of my family to actually contemplate far less able to do so; as my Gran, I learnt, was clearly obliged to get married as she was simply up the duff when she did so while rather tellingly Mum had me at 15, aptly quite predictably so according to Gran, having readily relinquished her virginity at the age of just 14, rabid promiscuity on mum's part which undeniably resulted in her being up the stick with me really as the literal consequence of an orgy, that really she was fervidly part of with a group of itinerant, building workers that then were evidently, undeniably employed officially as a workforce and by my Mum to effectively be aptly the routine, ex-tempore sexual commodity, truly appropriately within her prudish community. Relevant individuals simply to Mum but rather obviously not any apparent reciprocation in direct response from them to her, other than the very usual sexual one, that undoubtedly simply left her pregnant with me after they'd literally gone. Now, despite all my earnest precautions undeniably so to evidently, preclude me from being like either my Gran or Mom, yet in spite of them, there I was plainly pregnant and actually so at simply 16, and essentially quite obviously, not in love with the man, who unmistakably got me so, nor he equally undeniably significantly with me and discernibly with both of us intelligently realizing that any such imposed "consensual" marriage on our part, was really the last thing that either of us evidently wanted, or would itself be distinctly decidedly emotionally beneficial to our individual or irrefutably too our joint future welfare, and effectively therefore, logically and abundantly significantly, quite unquestionably, or very unmistakably also actually be intelligently considered, by any astute person, as a valid solution! Mom though, ridiculously sought to have the final word by seriously suggesting that this young man, five years my senior, significantly from her clearly narrow perspective in full employment, and who'd obviously always been quite significantly, crazy about me; feelings, which I evidently did know about, but neither sensibly encouraged on his part nor actually in anyway crucially reciprocated on mine. Yet for all that, there was my mother very blatantly, encouraging me to now literally, and undeniably totally brazenly, distinctively make essentially unconcealed amorous overtures towards him effectively and very immediately afterwards, followed by my distinct seducing of him; evidently unquestionably, simply letting him ignorantly and ardently take the bait which was on offer; with him becoming not only a loving and fittingly dutiful husband, but also an amenable, malleable and controlled father! (C) Stanley V. Collymore 4 November 2023. Author's Remarks: This poem is written about and, rather similarly too, specifically for Yvette - her surname is definitely not essential here, whose express permission I essentially have to do this. Yvette Forster came to my attention when she quite voluntarily joined an extra-curricular group that I'd previously established to facilitate the discarded needs and rather uncatered for abilities of children, debarred from schooling, in my home town and also neighbouring areas. Children that either because of the simply evidently odious and distinctly obvious bigotries they did encounter, were unquestionably awfully shunned because of them and were all connected to their Black race and skin colour, conjoined with similar intense and debilitating prejudices because of their societal environment - take that to quite literally mean white working class and council estate residencies - were they lived, and were more likely to be summarily booted out of the British educational system for so- called anti-social behaviour and the quite usually toxically hyped rigmarole, while similar activities and even worst committed by the public school perceived elites as well as the Middle Class social climbing sycophants will naturally and instantaneously be considered as just "high spirited behaviour"; it was quite obvious to me the Yvette - who is white - was equally short-changed as all the others, Black and White, who were all part of this extra-curricular group that I'd individually set up. To fast forward Yvette did exceptionally well and readily integrated with all the other members of the group. Ultimate like many of the others she got a well-deserved place at university where she studied science and subsequently on graduating and with the group's full support went to the USA to do her PhD which she excellently sustained. Yvette never married her mother's very convenient choice of husband for her, nor the father of her son who manfully did ask her to marry him but she quite candidly refused his offer of marriage, her explanation being, she recounted to me years later that marriage should be about genuine love and commitment, not convenience. However, her child's father, unlike many in his situation, did commendably and voluntarily accept his paternal responsibilities to his own offspring as well. While in the USA Yvette did meet and fall in love with a young man she met at university there. He knows the full story of her life, for as the honest person she is, Yvette wanted no secrets of hers hid from him. They're now married, Yvette has her PhD and that lovely son of her is himself at university studying to a doctor; stating that his ultimate aim is to a surgeon. © 2023 COLLYMOREAuthor's Note
|
Stats
42 Views
Added on November 4, 2023 Last Updated on November 6, 2023 Tags: Inspirational, motivational, courage. AuthorCOLLYMORECambridge, Cambridgeshire, United KingdomAboutAcademic, Journalist, Writer. I'm a highly intelligent, articulate and well-educated human being with an intuitive but enterprising sense of responsibility and a strong moral compass that instincti.. more..Writing
|