Burn it down , Young

Just two lil essays or something.

Standing on top of park hill i look out onto my precious city. With all its demons and sins burried deep within it's soul. A beautiful town, quite and still, corrupted to its very core. Such a shame. It has all been my home for so long, but now it must all be burned down. With all its sinners i shall burn it down, everything, Nothing shall remain and i shall watch at the sky bleeds ashes. With tears i shall scream out with rage and pain as fire surrounds me and destroys everything. All those i know and love, i will give them warning. Watch out for the burning buildings! Stay away! This city looks so pretty, do you wanna burn it with me? Oh baby lets watch this city burn!

 

We are young! Let our voices be heard. So many expectations are put on us. Many high, most low. We are expected to be pot heads, druggies, To be in jail, to steal, to rebell, to lose,, to fall. But shall we? No! Yes we will do most of those things.Born in this world as it all falls apart. They expect us to be smart, powerful, great, to make it so high and for them to be always proud of us. Makes it all harder when we fail them. But we are young! There is still more to come! Shall we meet those expectations? Some we shall but note this. No matter what, no matter how hard we fall. There will always be time to pick back up. And there will be friends surrounding you young as well that understand, that know, they will always be there for you. We are still young! We will still fight!  

WE ARE GONNA CONTROL THIS WORLD SOON

Author's Note

Insperations-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rqai8e0MF9Q
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=colXrqMAsOA

Reviews

[Clarisse Nanoit]

I really like the first one a lot. There are a lot of spelling and grammar errors, but I try not to dote on them. Toward the end, you get a little bizarre, but it almost feels like an increasing hysteria due to the subject matter. It's a nice technique, intentional or not.

The second one, I don't like too much. Mostly because I don't agree. "We are expected to be pot heads, druggies, To be in jail, to steal, to rebell, to lose,, to fall. But shall we? No! Yes we will do most of those things." I think you were getting somwhere with that strong, "No!" but then you backed off and said we'd do most of those things. But I think it makes too much of a generalization at any rate. Most teenagers aren't potheads or druggies, and I don't think most people expect them to be. I'm not. I've never been in jail, never stolen, never really rebelled, hardly lost, and have fallen often. Just saying; and most of my friends and close peers are in the same boat with me. I do however, like the unity demonstrated at the end. One thing I always want to make sure of is that I surround myself with people who care and that I'm always there for them.

And I think I'd consider the first one a vignette more than an essay.

KH