Untitled

A quick poem on my relationship with someone special.

We both trudged through different layers of soot and regret.
The thought of someone like you kept me from harm and yet -
A self portrait of lethality and failed ambitions in the mirrors surface.

Hazel eyes gazing through strata of smoke.
The cretins of our own psychology afloat.
You kept me upon a renascent gateway - rendering me wordless.

Your worth to me is incalculable.
Through the cryptic signals and sacramental prose,
you had to have always known:

We may haul the weight of dead men in our minds,
But you will always have my appreciation and time,
and your advice - will always be hone.

Author's Note

If you spot any grammatical errors, or if you notice anything with syntax, let me know, otherwise, just leave any advice, or constructive criticism, or just let me know if you really liked it, or one line even, thank you readers.

Reviews

[J. B.]

I really enjoy how this flows. The meter is different and we'll constructed. Grammatically, I would suggest watching what you capitalize and where you place capitalized words. Other than that, job well done!

[D.]

Thanks for the comment on the meter, I've honestly never paid attention to my own flow before, but I appreciate that someone likes it. I will keep watch on the capitalization though.

[Davidgeo]

Very last word... hone? I figured it'd be home.

Great work. Superb lines that come together like this is not a common thing.

[D.]

I've been burnt out for over a full year, I just posted a new poem if you're interested.
I very much appreciate your input, I chose hone because I think about this person's advice much more often then I care to admit, and hone felt like a more appropriate word for this context.

[Davidgeo]

I agree with that, hone is better... more apt in context.

[The Inner Me]

"Your worth to me is incalculable." Great line. I enjoyed the read. Keep up the good work!

[D.]

Thank you so much. It means a lot to me that you left your thoughts.