Proper Fucked

This is a poem about oppression. It is simple and direct. It is, in large part, about truth. I hope you enjoy it. Please leave a comment.

How long, dear lord, how long, 

will they obstain will over me. 

How truly painful is there tone, 

and haunting there decree. 

In every way that counts, i bear. 

there violence and verosity 

then find a way through bothered minds.

that thirst for me to fade away. 

I do accept and swallow pride

Injest your name indeed I spoke. 

In silence i do find my peace. 

A peace that creeps within my sheets. 

So sleep I do, inception true, how hacked

devized this tender thing. 

A tender thing like untainted minds, and precious

water in the spring. 

Will never know if words devized, can tell my story true and true

And if I tried would you subside I'll let the world decide for you. 

I hear their cheers, and violent laughs, they smile with fangs, sadistically. 

A sheep it never claimed to be, mofe like a wolf raised viciously. 

No larger prey, I am to thee, so run I run from calm to scared. 

Put 20 dollars on the lurch and proper fucked will be the hare. 

Reviews

[Betty Hermelee]

many strong words to portray oppression, which is difficult to swallow,those that are oppressed many times fear other people of different sociology-economic status ... us lucky ones will never know how oppression feels; when people stare at you, cajole you, laugh at you....can you ever find you peace....maybe within the sheets at night....an important comment you make....
Warmly, B

[Lisasview]

Matthew,
Hope you are okay with a bit of grammar help...
It is their not there...This is in your first stanza
In your second stanza you need to capitalise the I as it shows this i now.
and, again it need to be their as you are taking about a person.. not saying for example ...Over there is the bus stop.
Third stanza needs to be a capital I.
In your 6th stanza you do not need a comma before ... and violent
Next line I believe you meant more not mofe...
I am helping a little because I really do like your poems idea.
Do you have spell check on your computer? That would help...
Please except my apologies if you are not interested in a truthful review...but as I said I did like your poem ... just felt it needed a bit of help.
Lisa, in Spain

[Pax]

In silence i do find my peace.
A peace that creeps within my sheets.

Love those lines, it can resonate to me so much. We run to our own liar, we hide and succumb to our doom. But that doesn't meant it's the end of it. Because we always knew there's a tomorrow. Today's sorrow is yesterdays event. We self reflect to be better... Our peace between the sheets is perfect.

[Matthew Daalling]

Wow. Thank you so much for saying that. Just trying to be real here. Thank you for your critic. Its a way of saying, that sometimes we can find peace in sleep. In slumber. It can actually be very soothing.

[Matthew Daalling]

i would really appreciate hearing what you think of my other poems.

[Minnesota Fats]

Lots of energy. Very cool stuff.

[Matthew Daalling]

thank you, its actually a song i through together.