Betrayed!

Giselle and I had been toughing it out,

With arguments every day,

She loved to spend, and I was the bank

To the point that I said, ‘No way!’

Then she pouted, much as she’d always done

And she dragged me into her bed,

That was the weapon she always used

When trying to turn my head.

 

She spent it faster than I could earn

Though I’d had a win on the gee’s,

A seeming broken-down six year old

A gelding with rickety knees,

I knew the horse was a stayer, though

In a field of sprinting mares,

And after the twenty-five hundred mark

Went rocketing past them there.

 

I’d dropped a grand, two hundred to one,

The bookies had thought me mad,

But I was rolling in bags of cash

That evening, back at my pad.

Giselle had snaffled a grand or two,

The rest went into the bank,

I wanted to buy a house and land

And I had that horse to thank.

 

Giselle just wanted to spend and spend

And I finally told her ‘No!’

It was more important to save than splash

On clothes or a picture show,

She’d disappear for days on end

Then come back, looking for cash,

And every time that I told her no

She’d use her tongue, like a lash!

 

I got a call on a Thursday night

To meet her up in the town,

She wanted to meet in the basement

Of a car-park, underground,

I thought I should, I could meet her there

And finally call it quits,

There wasn’t a whole lot of love to share,

That part had fallen to bits.

 

I parked the car and I saw her there

But she stood, and waited for me,

Close to a concrete pillar, then

A shadow was all I could see,

A guy came out and pointed a gun

And Giselle said, ‘Go on, shoot!’

I heard the retort, two bullets fired

As they tore through my business suit.

 

I don’t recall there was too much pain

Just the echoing sound of the shots,

I swayed and crumpled, my knees gave way

I thought I was dead on the spot.

I lay unable to move while she

Rifled my pockets through,

Took my passbook, spat in my face,

Said: ‘That’s what I think of you!’

 

They found me there in a pool of blood,

I don’t remember the rest,

The police were sat by my hospital bed,

They said they’d made an arrest.

They’d picked the guy and had matched the gun

When Giselle had put him in,

And he must have emptied my bank account,

She said - It was all just spin!

 

They thought they’d left me for dead out there,

Had freaked when I was alive,

Giselle thought she could cover herself

By telling a thousand lies,

She’d been ‘an innocent bystander’,

She said, was scared by the gun,

She’d wanted to meet me there, she said,

Hit the town, and have some fun.

 

She came to visit and sat by the bed,

Looked sick and she cried a lot,

She asked me what I remembered, and

I said, ‘Not even a jot!’

I could have had her arrested then,

Made a statement based on fact,

But I had my very own vengeful thoughts,

And that would put paid to that.

 

The shooter they found dead in his cell,

Strung up with a blue striped tie,

He just couldn’t face a life in jail

While Giselle stayed high and dry.

They’d seen each other behind my back

She’d sucked him in for the kill,

I hid my total contempt for her

But it called for an iron will.

 

It took three months and she moved back in,

She was finally over her fear,

But needed to cover herself, I knew

She’d leave, when the coast was clear!

She had my money, all stashed away,

In a locker at Central Park,

I’d found the key in her underwear

As I roamed around in the dark.

 

One night I said we should take the train,

Go down and take in a show,

We got to the end of the platform, and

I hustled her down below,

Down and into the tunnel, said:

‘We’re taking a shorter way!’

Revenge is a dish served cold, I thought,

I was cold as cold that day.

 

We came to an iron grating that

I lifted, to hustle her down,

Down on a rusty ladder to

The sewers, run under the town.

I cuffed her there to a water pipe

While she screamed and kicked and spat,

When I left her stood in the sewage there

I could see the first grey rat!

 

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[Jazique]

Nice, revenge a lobel detailed revenge to an evil betray. you had me hooked and hanging waiting to the end as the climax rised. honestly it was like mr. burns said 'excellent'. The details of such a thriller, tragic, mystery, suspenseful poetic story. well done and how she dies, got to be the worst way to die; by the beady eyed rats that huant us under life. i can feel.the chills. well done (clapping)

[MOON]

revenge is a dish served cold ... ha ha , left in a sewer with rats , you one scary guy... Haunting write lovely.

[lee von cleef]

Wow you are good, my story of that same loss is too long to give in review,but a solid gold dancer was she a little teddy and bare she came to stay,I let her she let me but when it came time to move ,I went to my moms she to hers ,Shining my shoes was a girl with cleavage enough to hide your key, I look up and there the solid gold honey badger goes,holding hands with a new guy, He must of owned a pawn store or been a broker of sorts , because in three weeks they were married and add two years he used a thin blue tie to swing in his new garage,Yes I think you have been reading my mail, yet the storys not done four or three I don't remember years later I stopped in a city in Oklahoma where the Christmas wind blew, had a girlfriend needed a bobble to smile for life, so I stopped to buy her something so she would give to me, Christmas is supposed to be better then that but .. that's where I was at.The gal at the store there said let xxxxx Help you and guess who stood there? One the same hungry honey badger, I turned to get outside quick as I
could, only to find a flat tire on the front of my car .Dad always said "it is the little things that you do that will make your horse win"So Hell I didn't worry about the rim ,I down shifted drove out in the street never looked back, I knew how to change a tire , buy a rim ,anythings better then swinging on a rope that's too thin.

[Emerald Seas]

"Revenge is a dish served cold, I thought,
I was cold as cold that day."
This sums it up so nicely. What a fantastic write to come to today! I enjoyed reading this immensely - of course, my mood is full of the devil today so I read with a smile and nodded my head to the steady build of up of the upcoming revenge.
Nicely written, David!

[Sheila Kline]

Reminds me a bit of the series "Revenge" where the character gets back in the most clever of ways at those who have ruined her life.
Your character was wise to her unwise ways and she got "her due" in the end. I could hardly wait to find out what he would do to her -I surmised she would land up on the train tracks while he watched her getting "done in", but what he did was far more clever!
Excellent meter, rhyme, and STORY!!

[roarke]

...and I always liked the name Giselle. lol
money and women don't mix. Bullets, blood and sewer rats... now that's a good mixture. I honestly don't know how you figure all this stuff out, let alone meter it. Great contemporary intrigue.

[David Scott]

The fun and intrigue of a novel in a short poem. You never disappoint.
Thank you for the example of a great poem.
Be well

[Patricia B. Hepler]

OOoooo! A true revengeful guy (and he certainly deserved to be!) Gisele certainly earned her "new pet rat", now didn't she?! I was so drawn in by this tale that I couldn't wait to find out how he would get revenge on her..and it was a doozy ;) Another excellent story, David.
~pat

[Shreyas Tripathy]

I love the way your poems narrate the whole story !
Though I am not sure if Gisele is supposed to be the "rat" or not ?
Anyway, very well written and as always, had a wonderful time reading it :)

[Valentine]

Just who was the real rat in this..him..her..or the one in the sewer..Part of this explains just what is the matter with the world today..people spend money they do not have just to keep up with those next door..Ever new contraption they see they have to have. I sometimes think the joy in this is the getting even...when a person can get even with providence..whoopee..Nice write david..love an God bless Lyn and you..Kathie I wonder just how much money was won and lost on those betting on Tate..and his horses..