Insomnia

Rough draft

She lay down her body, but oh not her mind

For peace from her thoughts she was unable to find

A million ideas would race through her brain

Another sleepless night, oh what a pain

Up she sat, to the kitchen she walked

Through darkened hallways and shadows she stalked

She needed that sleep, there was no time to kill

So she opened the bottle and swigged down the pill

With insomnia, often you'll find

To stay alive, one must kill their mind

Author's Note

This is more of a rough draft I suppose, Opinions?

Reviews

[K. Bridgid]

Wow, this is incredible. The way this is written made me feel as if it were happening to me. I love your writing because it just makes me feel something every time. It breaks my heart, it makes me tear up. It's so beautiful. It's so powerful. It's true. It's emotional. It brought shivers down my spine.

[Death's Poet]

That is the sweetest thing Brigid! I am so glad that the emotions are conveying to the reader and the fact that you like my poetry really warms my heart!! Thank you!

[PonoEllis]

I agree with cagan, such a true statement that's also creepy :)

[Death's Poet]

once again your reviews make my day Pono :)

[Cagan]

Wow, i loved that last line. So chilling and so true!

[Death's Poet]

Thank you so much!

[Not Your Typical New Yo..]

There's something about sleeping, or just right before, that brings all of your thoughts and you can't help but race through them, and then some of them make you stay up late, or couldn't put it to rest. I liked this. It's a truthful piece.

[Death's Poet]

thank you very much Newyorker! I really appreciate your feedback!

[Not Your Typical New Yorker]

You're quite welcome :)

[Rayene Mehriche]

Well-expressed! I enjoyed reading this poem.

[Death's Poet]

Thank you so much!

[Harpreet kaur bajwara]

hey its very nice.i liked it

[Amelia May]

This is not bad for a rough draft.
However, I do not believe that there are rough drafts for poems because even a mistake in writing just adds meaning to the poem.