Of Objects I've Held

Of Objects I've Held

A Poem by DrSprinkz73

You're a woman made of paper
I can cut you short
I can stretch you tall
Crumple you into a round strong ball
Or reinvent you and make you soar..
With simple strokes you will be a thing of beauty
With a cut or tear you will be simply ugly
Your mind and body
are my canvas
From drab colors
to an emerging rainbow

Ooh Lady Paper how you are mine

.. I can use you up
... I can throw you away
. Maybe leave you there for someone else to find

© 2010 DrSprinkz73


Author's Note

DrSprinkz73
Okay so I see you guys are saying that some lines are weak or commenting the "strong" prt but what youre not grasping is that This Woman This Paper is being MANIPULATED by me so I can make her STRONG as well as WEAK

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I like the strong imagery in this poem. And it's got a simple rhythm and matter of fact way of stating something so surreal. I also like the formal choice of right justifying it, and placing the punctuation (except in line four, something to possibly fix) at the "beginning" of the lines. It gives a very strong impression that something is off, or backwards. To me, the weakest lines are "Your mind and body/are my canvas/from drab colors/to an emerging rainbow." The preceding lines are very precise and literal in their meaning, and that gives them real power. Try to keep that precision. I really like the idea of the paper. Kind of like a note or a sketch, and the shortness and disposable-ity of it. The last lines really play into that, and I think you could do something really "fun" with that idea.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Yet, you still view the paper as "strong." I really like what you did with this piece. Sounds like you have had, or maybe still have, quite a few choices. Good job!

Posted 11 Years Ago


I like the strong imagery in this poem. And it's got a simple rhythm and matter of fact way of stating something so surreal. I also like the formal choice of right justifying it, and placing the punctuation (except in line four, something to possibly fix) at the "beginning" of the lines. It gives a very strong impression that something is off, or backwards. To me, the weakest lines are "Your mind and body/are my canvas/from drab colors/to an emerging rainbow." The preceding lines are very precise and literal in their meaning, and that gives them real power. Try to keep that precision. I really like the idea of the paper. Kind of like a note or a sketch, and the shortness and disposable-ity of it. The last lines really play into that, and I think you could do something really "fun" with that idea.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I actually love this poem.
It's on the verge of demonic and sadistic.
But definitely has a purpose.
Your overall meaning is great
And your last three lines are my favorite.


Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Shelved in 1 Library
Added on July 8, 2010
Last Updated on July 10, 2010
Tags: woman

Author

DrSprinkz73
DrSprinkz73

Chicago, IL



About
I am not a simple person. But I do prefer all the simplicities in life. I can't say it's my dream to become a published writer I ust enjoy what I do. I have goals. I tend to lean towards darker wr.. more..

Writing