If I had to choose all over again, I would still choose you

It hurts to see you in pain...And it hurts when I feel I am not helping enough...But most of all it hurts a lot more when you speak of death...

I see him troubled and I stand still

Unable to think of how to help him

I wonder if he will ever forgive me for not being so helpful

I wonder if he will ever understand how hard it is for me to see him like this

I try to show him my love and my feelings that are bottled inside me

 

He speaks of suicide and it kills my soul

I need him in my life, I love him so

I wish I can guide him

I wish I can help

 

But no matter what I do, it is not enough

I wish I can take away his pain

Wipe away his tears

But he never cries to me, he cries alone

 

I see him confused and furious

I see how he sees no future

And all I want is to guide him so he can see how wonderful he is

To see how important he is to me

 

I just hold him close to me wishing I can make him feel at ease

I hold him so close and promise him that everything will be alright

But how can I make him believe?

 

He needs me so much

 I don’t know what to do

How do I save him from himself?

How do I help him through?

 

He lies down in bed daydreaming of how life would be better without him

While I sit here thinking of how blessed I am to have him

But I still wonder, does he really know what I feel?

Does he understand how terrible I feel for his pain?

 

``Hush little brother, it will get better tomorrow``

``The rain doesn’t pour forever, and tomorrow the sun will shine again``

He looks at me and says ``Everyone is better off without me, I am only a burden on you``

I burst into tears

I say ``If I have to choose all over again who I want for a brother, I would still choose you``

Author's Note

This is something that I wrote from my heart when I saw how troubled my younger brother is. Feedback is appreciated.

Reviews

[Glen Yumang Manese]

the endearment in the lines as you give all you can to the one in need..which is your brother...as a reader I feel that despair in the lines...and the way you end the verse hits home and if that does not send a message...hope is always near...yet you must accept it to move on...