Saturday On The Progressive
A Story by Earl Schumacker
One day is as good and as practical as any other
There is only one day, Saturday. Saturday is the only day of the week. Actually, there is no week or weeks. How could there be since there is only one day, Saturday and Saturday, therefore is a day and not a week. It is the only day and it is called Saturday. There are no Saturdays because that would be silly. How could there be plurals. There is only the one day, “singular” and that would be Saturday.
Not everyone agrees. I have been challenged on other matters as well. It does not matter; The world being round for instance. I laugh at such foolishness. Everyone knows the Earth is a cube. In the remote past there was an ice age. It was referred to as the Ice Cube Age. It goes without saying those were hard times.
A couple of years ago people thought the world was flat. How ridiculous is that? The supporters of this theory say, quite convincingly, that when you travel to the end of flat world, the reason you don't fall off is; you will instantly be transported to the other side of the world by unknown forces in nature. They suggest this occurs by the use of particle conversion or teleportation or magic. You instantly re-materialize at the beginning of the world from the end of the world and who doesn't love magic and who in their right mind wants to fall off the planet? For people traveling by boat there is a great ice wall to keep people from slipping off into the cosmos. You can't argue with that logic.
Saturday thinkers keep things simple. You do not have to think about the beginning or end of it. Saturday begins and ends the same way, “Saturday.”
Nowadays people are starting to come around to progressive thinking. They even call themselves Progressives. They don't always operate on solid ground with firm ideas. There is very little gravity in their world. They float around in empty space like snow flakes and operate purely on instinct. They survive on pure emotions. Oxygen and nitrogen are consumed only at special occasions like parties, full moonlight exposures on werewolf nights and when absolutely necessary at conventions sponsored by friends of their kind, who like them back no matter what they do or say. If memory serves me, this all occurs under and within the parameters of Saturday.
In the end we will always return to Saturday. Personally , I am constantly consumed by it. It occupies my hours, my thoughts and dreams. I thank God for Saturday. I live for Saturday. Next to God and Saturday I love running and nothing else. I run the world over with my mouth and foot....no need for thinking... I am a regular *Philippides on feet. I ran out of and from my mother's womb. I have been running ever since. I will return to her one day. Maybe Saturday.... This Saturday if I get the chance and there are no others because there is no other mother or Saturday for that matter.
* Pheidippides or Philippides is the central figure in the story that inspired a modern sporting event, the marathon race. Pheidippides is said to have run from Marathon to Athens to deliver news of a military victory against the Persians at the Battle of Marathon.
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© 2018 Earl Schumacker
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Author
Earl SchumackerAtlantic City, NJ
About
B.A. Degree in Literature and Language. I enjoy writing short stories, poetry, novels and keeping up with new scientific discoveries. I enjoy philosophy and Art appreciation. more..
Writing
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