Beyond The Law

What happens when you throw someone off the cliff

Beyond The Law

“Your honor!” “This lady, the defendant, pushed me off the high cliff at Southerton Ridge.” “She laughed at me while I tumbled over to certain death.” “She committed this most heinous and hideous crime in front of others who were shocked by her juvenile behavior. What had just transpired in broad day light was surreal. It filled the witnesses with fear and trepidation.” “Prior to the incident Agatha was my very best friend for oh so many years.” “She is not a very nice person.” Judge Wallow pounded his hollow gavel on the bench, which struck like the hammer of Thor, a deafening thunderous impact, which awakened everyone present, including, perhaps, a dead body or two in attendance or perhaps somewhere within ear shot.

The Old man stammered and stuttered weakly from above, “Order in the court!” He was hearing voices again, seeing phantoms that could not be accounted for in the conventional sense by him or any other rational individual who happened to occupy seats at his dawning court.

Said apparitions were dwelling there in their midst, in the real world, as solid as concrete according to the old magistrate. The old buzzard's talking points had to be accepted as facts. The ancient civil servant, who had difficulty seeing things straight in the first place, could not be wrong about anything visible or invisible, ever since he was appointed to dwell in those lofty clouds up there on the judicial high court, presiding there on a warm bench and surrounded, literally covered in that eloquent thick fog of justice way up there in his holier than thou station in life, more powerful than the holy pope in Rome. He offered up no evidence or proof of what he perceived or what he was postulating as spirits were in fact there or actually true. The laws of state and nature protected him from in his simplicity, from mortal man, from such trivial matters such as sanity or reason and all such things related to his opinion that were and are in keeping with the laws of nature in his estimation as he wished them to be.

Spectacles were of little use in such matters. It became harder to see or find things that were by their very nature un-seeable or invisible to the naked eye or to those of us who are more advanced, more sophisticated members of our species. Being that the judge was a highly educated man, we must take him at his word. To be more precise, we are directed and required to take his word as gospel if and when he speaks. At this ungodly hour it became abundantly clear, the truth would be hard to find or pin down with all this sunlight dancing around in his courtroom. It would also be an all encumbering task to find the truth without the right visual apparatus strapped on or the precise lighting to conduct proper judgment, not to mention the stretching of, if not exorcism of the imagination, which required more than your average open mindedness or the scouring the depths of perception, which is to be expected from the men in high places, those individuals who delve into dimensions not knowable to begin with, who live among us mere mortals inhabiting the material world for the good of all.

Judge Wallow was an elderly magistrate in his nineties who was pron to seeing visions not seen by others. Perhaps there was nothing there. Two young ladies; the plaintiff and defendant stood before him like victim and prey. They looked like a couple of shimmering fuzzy shadow animals hovering about their podiums just out of reach, as seen through his honors thick lenses, which were surrounded by even thicker black rims around his glasses, fashioned, attached there, settling on his nose and about his ears by thin wires, all of which occupied his moon like face.

Observers viewed him as a senile old relic, barely clinging on to life and consciousness, seated there on his high bench, round faced, bald head, glowing like a full moon on a starless day, overseeing justice for us all.

It was almost at the crack of dawn before the birds start chirping on the lawn that his highness began to bring order to the lives of the lawless and the good citizens of the fragile community.

Noises of any kind made him jittery, paranoid, almost on the verge of seizures, particularly at this insane, oddly weird hour of the morning. Nothing in this world could be brighter than him, not even the sun, which seemed to be mocking him and his judgment. He did not enjoy the competition of such celestial bodies at this or any other hour that might glow brighter than him or impose on his authority. No object could be mightier than him or become an obstruction to his brilliance and therefore his final judgment which must be untainted, pure, handed down with due diligence from the man in charge.

If he had his way, hearings and trials would be held at night, especially in light of and in consideration of the following facts; that he was born in the rarefied air of the mighty night, formed and fashioned there with and in his own likeness, which he liked very much, He was born with his own image in mind.

In and with and of his own image, he was made to be admired by mirrors and others for all eternity, with the true omnipotent powers sprinkled on top for good measure, ordained powers bestowed upon him by the state and nature, even before they came into being in the beginning.

That seems impossible on the surface but nothing is impossible where titles are involved. If you are god or even reference yourself as such so much the better.

He should surely be afforded every latitude, every consideration, every courtesy possible, pertaining to the high office that he occupies. What ever happened to good old fashioned respect and reverence for such a man of his stature and dignity in life? What ever happened to the concept of age and wisdom before youth and beauty?

As an officer of the courts, a man of justice, a man of the highest integrity, who comes with such impeccable credentials, he felt slighted by the judicial system, an invented agency at best, an entity only there to hold him down and hold him back from his own glory. It only makes sense to hold court at midnight where justice really comes to life, glows white hot, like a bright light dagger emanating enlightenment, cutting through all sin and criminality in a single slice, through the soiled souls of dirty humanity, that foiled failure seeking manna from heaven not eaten, that bread of life discarded with the truth.

Mornings never were his cup of tea. He too had to answer to a higher power though. This sobering fact made him angry and even as ornery as a baby in a soiled diaper. He wanted to throw a tantrum but realized that action might be perceived as less than judge like among the masses. People were always hungry for more questions. (Answers are easier than questions to conjure up as a rule.) He would surely satisfy their needs if given half a chance to perform.

The law would still remain the law as long as he stayed seated and planted in their eyes. The eyes in his head needed to remain vigilant and steady. If they started to roll around or wonder off, people would get suspicious. They might take notice that he was not focused or have the ability to perceive reality or ready to spot and stop evil in its tracks.

All judges know in their heart of hearts that they are gods and deserve proper respect as such. Some men and women are simply born into their station in life, cast in a mold for perfection at the dawn of time.

It was his destiny to be here at this particular date and time to pass judgment and seal the fate of the two young ladies standing, literally shimmering right there before him, bathing in the light, the magnificence of the magistrate.

Under a cloudy eyed squint, under the best of circumstances, the judge could hardly see the humbled victim and the arrogant prey squirming, wiggling before him, ready to perform their acts, to testify for all who were gathered there to listen. He struggled to stay alert and erect in his crumpled, over sized robe, which seemed to bury him in its folds. He was so frail, so tiny, as little old men are apt to be.

The oversee-er of justice continued with, “If there is another outburst or sound of any kind I will have this court cleared.” Miss Cutie, the plaintiff in this matter, continued with her testimony despite the fact that the judge wanted total silence in the chamber. This obvious incongruity made her twitch with fear but she prevailed and stated clearly. “Your honor, my former friend Agatha here, didn't even look over the ledge to see if I was dead or alive after she pushed me.” “Fortunately there was a narrow slate shelf just below the top ledge where I tumbled, collapsed and fell onto unconscious.” “If I had missed the extended lip there, I would have fallen thousands of feet straight down and would not be here today to give testimony to the facts as they are now unfolding, clear and evident for you all to see in the light of day and to hear with the voice of truth and comforting reason.”

The ancient one pointed a wobbling crooked index finger in the general direction of the defendant, who had been nibbling away at her finger nails to while away the time in her indifference. In a trembling weak voice the old man instructed Agatha to speak, “Young lady, what do you have to say for yourself?”

Agatha flashed her pretty brown peepers at the judge hoping to gain his favor. They were like two beams of light emanating from a lighthouse, cutting through thick fog, trying to find lost ships at sea to warn them, to save them from collisions with the rocks. He was blind as a bat so her beacons of hope went unnoticed. Her obvious powers and strengths as a huntress were being overlooked by the court at that moment but she proceeded on with the confidence of a tragic queen in battle.

She smiled with her voluptuous ruby red lips then launched into a string of outrageous lies which were astounding, awe inspiring, monumental in their depth and breath, in their construct and sinuous delivery. “Your honor, I don't know what she is talking about.” “I don't even know this woman.” “I have never met her or seen her before today.” “As a matter of fact, I was home taking a bath at the time she said this incident happened.” “That makes her a crazy lady don't you think?” “I am a very unique person, so much so that I spend most of my waking hours taking several baths and showers a day to maintain my pristine image, my pretty self and clean little old me.”

“I keep myself fresh as a daisy in my purity of body, mind and spirit.” “Plenty of soap and water sees to that.” “I never miss a spot.” “I am an innocent soul, a well respected mature woman, young and pretty, an asset to the community.” “I would never hurt a fly and I keep myself out of trouble at all times with a curtsy and a smile.” “I take pride in my appearance.” “Miss Cutie over there is jealous of me and my beauty so let her ramble on with her insanity and innuendos.” “She is fabricating these wild lies, these false allegations, only to garner the attention of the feeble minded.”

It was true. Agatha was and is very attractive. It was obvious too that she was very clean. She brought soap to court to prove it. At the hearing she wore a long blue dress, conservatively buttoned up to the neck for the sake of propriety. She sported dainty white gloves on her ivory soft hands for that cosmopolitan look. Her long brown hair was up in a bun, perfectly shaped, kept in place with bobby pins and hair spray. She smelled sweet like lavender and honeysuckle. Butter would surely melt on her golden tongue when she opened her pouting lips to speak. In fact there was nothing wrong with her that a good old fashioned spanking could not cure but then again she might just enjoy such actions and ensuing attention a beating might produce. Pink glowing cheeks were never in short supply from what could be surmised.

The judge inquired of Agatha if there were or are any witnesses to corroborate her story. She went on to explain that there were several people in the bath with her at the time of Cutie's alleged incident. They are all hungry and eager to testify on her behalf and would love to do so but......(She paused.)

She went on to explain, “They send their apologies and respects to the court.” “They are unable to appear to support her cause, to tell the truth on her behalf, as much as they would love to but, due to circumstances beyond their control, a thing called work and other related obligations, sadly they are unable to arrive at these honorable proceedings.” “However, they do send their love and other pleasantries to the judge and all attendees.” (Smiley face included.)

The old magistrate looked somewhat perplexed, more so than usual, or was it the laxatives he had taken earlier that were now making a left turn in his system, turning him upside down, or was it perhaps the many pills which are taking him off the rails to a bad place, shaping his reality in a negative way. Perhaps these and other considerations were effecting his nasty facial distortions, but let us pray they were not influencing or altering his decision making faculties in these critical legal matters.

He gestured back to Cutie, the plaintiff, with a plea for her to elaborate more on her account of the events as they transpired and as she recalls them. He asked her if she had witnesses of her own who might support her claims of the push or anyone who might have seen anything in that regard.

The young woman was flabbergasted. She began to think bad thoughts. Perhaps the old coot might be swallowing the venomous blatant lies of her adversary; a girl who was oh so beguiling, cunning and deceptively evil in every regard. Was he being sucked into her vortex of sins, criminality, powers of persuasion and deceptive tactics with her boat load of lies and charming personality which were on naked shameless display for all the world to see?

She took a deep breath, gathered her composure and said, “Your honor, I have medical bills, hospital expenses and X-rays showing two fractures in my left leg and evidence of a sustained skull fracture.” “The concussion from the fall rendered me unconscious for several hours.” “As chance would have it, two lovers appeared at the site in the nick of time. They were there for other purposes but they found me when they looked over the ledge to get a better view of the lovely surroundings.” “I thank God they came to my rescue when they did.”

The judge stopped her at that point. He reprimanded her for bringing up God. “What do you mean you thank God?” “There is no god in the 9^th. Circuit Court in this land or any god in any court for that matter.” “There are only and exclusively judges to pass final judgment on us all.” “At this moment in time I am the only person you should be concerning yourself with; the one and only judge in your universe, the one who will decide your fate.” “I suggest you get focused on the facts young lady.”

“Where have you been for the past 30 or 40 years?” “We put a stop to all those ancient concepts about God.” “We did away with Him and the primitive rituals like having a person place their hand on a bible and swear to God to tell the truth and only the truth.” “Even The New York Times declared God dead and buried Him back in the early 70's.” “Where have you been young lady?”

“Wake up!” “You have the law.” “You have us.” “What more could you possibly need?” “Today we keep things simple.” “We ask you nicely and politely to tell the truth if you are so inclined.” “What could be easier?” “Now let us get on with your story.” “We all love a good story.”

Cutie began to dig herself a deeper hole. She told the judge that she is only 21 right now so how could she be around 30 or 40 years ago to experience any changes? She had not been born yet so how could she be expected to remember such radical changes in the judicial system, things that took place so many years ago before her time? She can hardly remember her own name and how to spell it or be expected to spell the complicated word, “judicial” let alone understand what it meant to have god in the mix back in those ancient times in history.

She was simply using a figure of speech in expressing how thankful she was to be alive, to have survived her ordeal when she referenced God. She had not lived long enough to regret the past or to have opinions on the present or the future or to think about heavy topics like church and state and God.

Fortunately for her and everyone else present, the magistrate fell into a deep sleep on the bench. It was way past his nap time. It was more like a coma but no one commented. After an hour or so of listening to him snore and feeling awkward to the point of discomfort about the situation, the bailiff, who knew instinctively that he was about to sink into waters way out of his depth and to make decisions far removed and far away from his pay scale, (which was meager at best), but he was ready to employ what little brain cells given to him at birth, rarely used on any occasion, for anything useful, but he was ready at this moment to employ them, to make an executive decision to dismiss the anxious people from the uncomfortable burden of being in the court under these sticky awkward conditions.

Just then, the old man began to stir. He came out of his all encumbering slumber dazed and confused. He stumbled around in his head in a half sleep to formulate words that might make sense, then finally grunted out, “Court dismissed.” “We will reconvene again in two decades.” Cutie realized that she would be 41 years of age at that time. She was not good at spelling but very good at math.

Hours later, after the judge had awoken, consumed several pills that came in a variety of colors, for a variety of ailments, he realized he had misspoken. He ordered his court officers to make contact with all people involved in the cliff case. Two decades would be entirely too long to let this juicy case go unattended. He would have the litigants and all parties connected to this affair directed to return back to court sooner than the 20 years he had stated or decreed. Everyone affiliated with the case would be required to be at the courthouse the very next day. Justice must be served.

Cutie, Agatha and other interested parties showed up on time the very next morning and they resumed where they had left off. The short one day break gave the plaintiff plenty of time to compose herself and to present the compelling facts for all to see and hear. Cutie started by saying, “Your honor, I have hundreds of pictures of myself with the defendant in my camera here, which will clearly illustrate that she knows me.” “They will prove unequivocally that she is more than acquainted with me.” “They will refute her story about not knowing me and dismiss her comments representing me as a complete stranger to her.”

The judge reminded her with a stern warning that he alone will decide what is the truth and what is not. Cutie gave the bailiff her digital camera smart phone to give to the judge. After carefully scrutinizing the pictures, the judge decided to find some merit to her evidence and her story.

The snap shots were indeed compelling, picture perfect, clear, fully colorful as represented, fully developed, as her story and her bosoms, and turned out in fact to be pictures of the defendant and the plaintiff seen together over an extended period of time. They were remarkable images. However, the judge decided to find them, “inadmissible.”

He gave a very concise presentation of his findings to the people gathered in the courtroom. It was a lesson in logic and jurisprudence. He explained clearly that the nature of hearings, trials and the like, are based on events that occurred in the past. Every legal proceeding that ever happened is the reconstruction of events that occurred in the past. You must literally bring a past event like a crime, here into the present for inspection; to be seen, heard, tasted, touched, smelled and perceived in real time. Only then can it be understood fully and judged as true.

Memory is your best friend or worst enemy in these instances.

While the great legal minds grapple with the herculean task of bringing the past into the present, something strange is happening. Time does not stand still. It is constantly in motion. It is always in flux. While one crime that might have occurred in the past is being presented in real time in a court of law, another crime is being committed outside that time line at the same time. The two different events immediately become events of the past. They become history at one and the same time while time moves along with all these unsettling un- provable events. Nothing could be truer.

With that in mind, according to the laws of reason, it is virtually impossible to bring the past into the present to show it to anyone because the past is the past. Only fragments remain of it in memory to be dealt with in the present.

The judge went on to explain how far we can go to reconstruct the past. No two people ever agree on what they perceive at the time of any given incident. Memory, short term or long term is a fleeting ephemeral thing. When the police interview people immediately after a car accident, one person might say the cars involved were red and green. Another eye witness on scene at the same accident might say they were not cars but trucks and they were yellow and white.

While the best lawyers are trying to bring even the simplest of crimes back from the dead, back from history; bring them into focus for our inspection, bring them here into the here and now, breath life into them to make them sing and dance like living beings, the truth remains; the crimes are lost, swallowed by the past while swimming towards the future. You can not have your cake and eat it too. The past and future are a matter of simultaneously happening matters. There is nothing to stop or start or merge such abstractions. No one can say definitively or prove completely what really and truly transpired in the past. With more time that elapses, passes us by, the more that reality, that history evaporates into the mist of memory.

When Wallow finished with his little dissertation, the magistrate made his final decree of judgment. “This case regarding a young lady pushing another young lady over a cliff is dismissed on the grounds “Causal plausibility and deniable plausibility.”

“A crime may or may not have been committed.” “No one died.” “You can thank me for that.” “To a certain degree we are all here in the here and now but rapidly moving into the future as I speak..” “We can barely prove that point here and now but I want to direct your attention over there in the corner.” “Can you see that little lost soul or spirit hovering in the shadows with an almost tangible smile?”

“In the present, in the here and now with all the information overload pouring over us and our lives, we are stumbling over ourselves falling into the river of time, drowning in a perceived reality with too much stuff.” “We are like vegetables and ingredients in a soup.” “We are not the makers of that soup.” “We do not control it.” “Just as we do not have control over our own lives.” “We are part of a condition, that chaotic condition of being in an unknowable life, in a giant pot being stirred around with the other things, by other people by other forces, by circumstances beyond our control,spinning with us, never knowing the beginning or end of things because there are so many things that distract us from what is real.”

“The plaintiff in this case tells an unusual, life threatening and simply strange story.” “It was amusing.” “The defendant tells an equally very interesting though completely far fetched story.” “All in all it was very entertaining.”

“You two girls are very lucky today.” “I could have easily had you both executed for simply arriving in my court room.” “Lucky for you I took my happy pills today.”

“My advice to you Ms. Cutie; stay away from high places and you lady Agatha; stay clean.”

“Court adjourned!” (“I hope that invisible creature in the corner agrees.”)

Judge Wallow also stated for the record, “I hope God does not come down and stick His giant finger in my soup.” “That would ruin everything.”

*Concave visions, convex views, straight and twisting meandering ways of the law are focused always on the far reaches of space and time in its never ending quest, endeavors and search for eternal truth.