Never Wednesday

Just around the corner of a canasta doomsday

Never Wednesday

Worship not your turtles on Tuesday

Driving a convertible in traffic is inadvisable

Places you at risk, in peril of bird droppings

Never yawn with mouth open and head up

Yawning is sacrilegious with seat belts off

If you have daughters, don't!

They are not turtles and this is not Vegas

If you have sons, feed them peanuts

They will not become elephants all of a sudden

But they are cheaper than you think

And much cheaper than pink

If you play cards on Thursday be warned

Turtles don't drink or smoke or gamble

Too many decks makes them sleepy

Don't worry about convertibles

Turtles drive trucks but not well

Never on Doomsday or Wednesday

That would be asking too much

They have trouble with the clutch

Doomsdays come around once in a lifetime

Never on Wednesday because that is canasta night

Beer and pretzels are free

(Bring your own pretzels and beer)

Leave your turtles at home

Worship them not on Tuesday

Canasta should never be trifled with

Bring two decks for security