"I Am the Trump and the Trumpeter !"

From the horse's mouth - just what is Donald Trump all about ?

“I Am the Trump and the Trumpeter !”

“I Am the Great !  The Rich !  The Bold !  I am the Trump !  Vote for me for President !”

“Why would I make a better Leader than the Stupid Losers we have now ?  I’ve gotta’ great Memory.  I speak extemporaneously while rambling all over the place about a fusion of topics.”

“What do I think about Illegal Immigration ?

“Well, I love the Mexican people.  They love me.  I do business with the Mexican people.  Their leaders are smarter than ours.  The Mexican government is smart.  They send us their worst people.  Their worst criminals.  They figure that if our Leaders are so stupid as to invite their drugs, their druggies, their drug thugs,  their trouble makers and their rapists into America - then why not ?  Now that’s smart.  Our Leaders, on the other hand are very dumb.  They‘re Losers.”

“I’m sure that there are some decent people coming over from time to time, too.  But most of the Illegals are criminals.  They need to come over Legally, and we need to fix that.”

“What do you mean how would I fix that ?  Hey, I need a journalist who will ask me questions that I like.  Let’s get someone else really quick.  Hey, you over there.  You look as though you might ask me a Question I‘ll like.”

“What about China ?  I Love China.  I love the Chinese people.  They pay me Rent at one of my high rises.  By the way, I own that high rise.  But the Chinese are my renters.  What’s not to like ?  They love me and I love them.  I struck the better deal, but that goes without saying….so I’m, saying it now.”

“The Chinese leaders are smarter than our Leaders.  They’re more cunning.  They make better deals than our stupid, Loser American Leaders and their equally stupid underlings do.  Our American Leaders and Deal Makers are all Losers.”

What about 9/11 ?  What about the Middle East ?  Yeah, the guys that blew up the World Trade Center were all Illegal Immigrants.  But I respect their Leaders.  Their Leaders are Rich.  I’m Rich.  Did I also mention that I’m Great and Bold, as well ?  Just checking.”

“Listen, America has Illegal Immigrants invading it from every country.  And all of those countries are sending us their worst.  They wanna’ get rid of them.  They want someone else to pay for the prisons to house them, and to feed and clothe them.  Or worse, our Loser Leaders will just let them run all around America murdering people whenever they feel like it.  The Leaders of the World are smarter than ours.  Our Leaders are stupid Losers.”

But, I do business all over the world.  I am a very Rich Man.  That impresses a lot of people because I know how to drive a hard bargain.  I know how to use modern media to get my mug on screens worldwide.  I know how to get people to talk about me, even when I’m not really saying much of anything.  I know how to spit out zingers and insult other people in the most hurtful and attention getting ways.

“The Leaders of the World respect me and I respect them.  I love the Leaders of the World.  So much so that I really want to be a member of their Exclusive Club.”

“Why is that so important to me, and so therefore to and for the American Sheeple, baa- baa ?  Excuse me,  I did not mean to baa.  That was a gastronomic expulsion brought about by the Illegal Pico de Gallo I ate over my enchiladas served to me by another bunch of worthless Illegals an hour before I got up on stage.”

“And by the way, have told you that I’m Great, Rich and Bold ?  I have ?  Good.  And have I told you that I’m running for the President of the United States of America ?  I have ?  Good.  And have I told you that I’ve got a good extemporaneously rambling 

memory ?  I have ?  Good.”

“Just don’t want all of you little propagandized, commercialized, corporatized, pea-brained Sheeple to forget the most important part of my campaign.”

“What ?  Do I have a plan to address all of the problems I’m insulting others about ?”

“Hey, I like your question.  It’s a good question.  I have more to say about that and other things.  Just follow me to my next scheduled speaking and announcement event in Arizona.”

“What do you mean that I’m not answering your question ?”

“I am the Answer to all of your Questions.  I am the Trump and the Trumpeter.  I am the Great, the Rich and the Bold !”

“Ha !  You’re right.  That does sound like the name of a new Soap Opera.   I think I’ll start production of that Soap Opera right now with my run for the presidency in 2016.  Imagine all of the free press and publicity.” 

“So, remember Sheeple.  Vote for me.  The Trump, the Great, the Rich the Bold and I might add - the shamelessly Beautiful !”