A Lonely Night

I put one of the nights my boyfriend and i broke up into a sort of short story.

It was now cold yet she did not turn off the air conditioner, and the only source of light came from the small fish tank that sat on a shelf in the corner of the room. She would often sit in the dark and watch her Beta Fish swim around for hours. Daydreaming in the night she wondered about life and the things that had occurred earlier that day. And although it was freezing…staring at the glow around that fish tank gave her a warm feeling that made her feel complete.

But tonight was different…everything inside of her felt cold and numb. So she slowly lays her head down on her neatly folded burgundy blanket named Saydee. Normally it would be Alex, her long rolley pillow but she figured she’d give Alex a break tonight. He’s had enough tears on him to last a lifetime.

Consciously she tells herself to fall asleep but the voice inside her head was being overtaken by the sound of her heart beat rapidly picking up speed. Effortlessly she holds her breath to slow it down. And just as she found piece of mind, the next song on her playlist comes on. And as the piano intro from Desiree’s Still in Love begins, so do the tears.

Suddenly the vibration of her phone brings her back to life. It’s him…the one that has all the power right now to come in and save me from myself. Yet he brings no comforting words. Only more and more tension comes from every receiving text. I now see that even he cannot save me. And all that can be done is done.

Reviews

[Phalguni Rao]

Its very descriptive but its odd that you begin in second person and shift to first person in the last paragraph. And I think you meant 'peace of mind' not 'piece'. SAydee and Alex, I found it cute. You did a nice job, nevertheless!