Slipping

Here's a little poem I wrote a while ago. When it feels like you're drowning, you're not. You're only slipping. Don't worry, the darkness won't last. You will see the light again. Trust me. xo Evie

S L I P P I N G

Slipping beneath the billows.

Not drowning,

just slipping.

Peace washing over me,

enveloped in an aura of blue,

a blue with no grey.

Bubbles rising above my head,

as I slip under.

Not drowning,

just slipping.

My hair,

soft and feathery,

curls itself around my neck.

It doesn't squeeze,

only tickles.

I slip farther down,

deep,

deep,

deep,

until the blue turns dark,

but not black.

I can't see the surface,

but that doesn't scare me.

Because I'm simply slipping,

not drowning.

                   - xo Evie

Author's Note

What do you think?
Is it inspirational?

Reviews

[emipoemi]

Your message is definitely a strong one, and you have a number of juicy lines, the last line included. My only concern is that many of your images appear to be cut short, and not fully completed, and therefore your musicality is a bit iffy. You can definitely play with this a bit more. It has potential. Poetry needs to flow, though, from image to image, through to thought, line to line. Like a painting of words that taps into the imagination of the reader. This is a great start! The inspirational quality is indeed there. But you can definitely expand a bit to make the images less distorted and blurry.

[Ghost writer]

I'd say it is, it reminds me of my friend. it sounds like we have a lot of similar interests

[AizenJ]

Complex! Wonderfully written.

[Evie]

Thanks so much!

[Coyote Poetry]

A very inspirational poem. You are very talented writer. I look forward to read more. Thank you Evie for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote