First Time

The first in a series of short stories I plan to write.

They burst into the room with far too much passion and heat for two people who had only known eachother for a few days.  She stumbled back, grasping one hand around his neck and the other stretched out, trying to get a feel of the room. She’s never been in this bedroom- let alone this house- before, but the only thing she felt was his lips pressed against hers and the heartbeat that thumped in her ears. She’d  clearly never done anything like this before and he was too focused on holding her tight against him and moving them deeper into the dark bedroom.  She glanced up at the clock.  

12:17 am.

It’s fine, I’m fine… This is what they want and…this- this is what I want. I could just put up with it for 20 minutes and then, um… fake it.  

She exhaled. What has her life come to? Making deals and compromising with herself for things she clearly didn't want to do… Rushing to the bedroom she has yet to have a heartfelt conversation with… Hanging out with people who are changing her life in ways she didn't understand.

They were friendly enough and kind of funny, but also demanding and pressuring. A constant push to do things she didn't really want to do.  But she did them anyways. She always let them convince her… but why?  She’s strong enough to stand up against them, she always has been, but never did.  

How did she let them convince her to drink? How did she let them convince her to dance with him? How did she let them convince her to come into this room with a boy she hardly knew? She never wanted it to happen like this. Rushed, messy and pressured.

They’d reached the foot of the bed.

“Are you good?” He breathed. His breath was hot on her face as she nodded stiffly.  She sat down and removed her shirt as he did the same, followed by a messy kiss to her neck. He slowly pushed them down and she felt her pants being pulled off.

She shut her eyes.

She felt something graze against her thigh.

A low whimper escaped her mouth.  “Meg?” He said pulling away. Tears streamed down her face and her body shuddered with each sob. She held the sides if her waist and moved to her side. He pulled up his pants then touched her arm. “Are…um are you okay?” His hand, once warm and racing, now cold and serious. All she did was shake her head and weep. She wept until there was nothing left to cry about and the sheets and her face were salty and wet with tears.

After what felt like hours she sat up and wiped her face. Through labored breaths she managed, “I-I don’t know who I am or… or what I want to be.” He got up and she feared he’d just left her to laugh with her “friends” but  he returned with a tissue and handed it to her.

“It’s a good thing we have time to figure that out.”

There was a faint smile on his face and though she was half-naked in a unknown bedroom with someone who was basically a stranger, she felt free to speak her mind and everything she’s been holding in.  She sat up, blew her nose and talked. She just talked and talked and cried and talked some more; realizing it was the first time in a long time that she got too. He listened; he sat and listened and seemed to understand. When she finally stopped her mouth felt like cotton and he had decided to bring the box of tissues to the bed.  She glanced up at the clock.

3:04 am.

She sighed and went to put her clothes back on. On her way out of the room she thanked the boy. On her way out of the house, she ended her “friendships.”  On her way home, there was a faint smile across her face.