Waiting for Fate

Waiting for Fate

A Poem by EverEmma
"

Time will come knocking on your door whether you like it or not

"

 

A mirror's corpse

A shattered fate

A forever eternity

 

I am trapped

My tears turn black

Raging, I cry

 

Mortality is overrated

I wait

A single discomfort

 

Stuck in the enigma

Deciding

Against strife or silence

 

Flowers bloom

They fade away

The Earth boils

 

Abundant in anguish

My senses die

I have hit rock bottom

 

The machines turn off

I stand up

Only to fall again

 

I am weak

I no longer care

I am in ruin

 

 

 

© 2011 EverEmma


Author's Note

EverEmma
Please be brutally honest but not disrespectful.

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Featured Review

I really like the line-" I am abundant in infliction" but do you mean affliction? as in you have something wrong, like an affliction...? other than that and one misspelled word (senses)- it is a good write! I can feel the emotion and the purposefulness in your writing. keep it up!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

i rather liked this piece. it was pretty well-written. although in my opinion it didn't flow too well, it seemed a bit choppy to me. the subject seem to sort of jump from one thing to another and although i can see the connection, you could have phrased it in a way so the stanzas melt into one another. at least in my opinion. however this piece had great meaning and i think that the message is clearly conveyed by the end.

Posted 9 Years Ago


wow this is amazing. i love the mood of this piece. great write :) keep it up

Posted 9 Years Ago


Nice edit. I will remember your macabre period :-) You express it well.

Posted 9 Years Ago


I like this, I like how raw it feels when you first read it, but I still think it needs just a tiny amount of work in this area- "heat over goes into override" is redundant, over and override don't seem to go together, you know? Otherwise, this was really good, keep it up :)

Oh yeah, and I love your icon xD

Posted 9 Years Ago


Very strong emotions coming from this piece. It's sad, but you write very well. The only line that bothered me was: "Heat over goes into override" But other than that, it was great.

Posted 9 Years Ago


I like it, but wonder about 'the machines turn off' ...
An emotional outline...well crafted in my eyes.

Posted 9 Years Ago


this is a really good write. (:

Posted 9 Years Ago


I like your last stanza, This is full of emotion.
I like this, written so well.

Posted 9 Years Ago


One little irk I found: the sentence "Heat over goes into override". It just plain didn't really make sense to me. I really enjoyed reading this! And the last few stanzas really got me. Once you hit rock bottom, it truly is the bottom. Everything goes up from there. :) It makes me think there's more to the story. Great job!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I really like the line-" I am abundant in infliction" but do you mean affliction? as in you have something wrong, like an affliction...? other than that and one misspelled word (senses)- it is a good write! I can feel the emotion and the purposefulness in your writing. keep it up!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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10 Reviews
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Added on June 26, 2010
Last Updated on February 2, 2011

Author

EverEmma
EverEmma

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