What did you expect to find here?

What could you expect to find in a world filled with liars and confused people? What can you expect when you look at yourself in the mirror each day? What can you expect out of life in general?

I don’t know what to expect.

I feel lost in a world of thoughts, I feel nothing.

I look at myself in the mirror each day silently hoping to find someone new.

Instead, I’m slowly watching myself lose color, as my mind starts to see the world in black and white.

My memory fades, I start to lose the beautiful smile many people miss.

I write and write but nobody understands how I feel deep within myself,

not knowing that my body is slowly disappearing into thin dust watching people just

kick me aside into a place where I become ghost.

They say to believe, but they don’t understand nor feel the emptiness that’s inside my heart.

As a new day begins, new tears are being dragged down my face, hiding my eyes as they become swollen.

I still don’t understand what I’m supposed to find, as I write in a book filled with empty pages.

I read to imagine a world of good, a world of love, the type of love that everyone desires.

To convince myself that there is a place for me out there in a world of dark places,

in a world where I can smile without holding it in leaving my heart to cry.

I may not know what to expect at this point, so far into this much heartbreak

but I am willing to go on an adventure to redeem myself.