thereupon

.ky,usa 10.Dec.2014.

hand cut stones, carefully placed long ago
crafted beams, tight wood seams, light gleams

and wrapped around the pier, river swirls below
bravely they tread, it was said, thereupon.

meanwhile the juveniles, pitifully unaware
leaning relic, nearly collapsed, but for now...

such is the joy of each new day, sun glare
soberly I tiptoe, it's been known, thereupon.

once planned for development, now forsaken
dead malls in mothballs, there's only walton's mart

last gasp of the plunderous grasp, all's been taken
swiftly we trample, it's a shame, thereupon.

down on knees, pulling weeds, nurturing nourishment,
still root digging and frog gigging, still marking bark,

wrapped in the provider's embrace, true contentment
slowly you breathe, it's living, loving, thereupon...

Reviews

[October Callow]

This is very nice. I like how the repetition isn't blaringly obvious, but it's subtly there. The rhyme scheme seems to be the same way too, just in the first lines of each stanza. To me, it appears to be describing how something was once a project, being worked on, but has since been abandoned, so maybe like a long lost love? I find it magical and alluring, while at the same time very simplistic. Very nice work, keep it up!

[FarisGreybear]

Wa-do! Thank You! From the covered bridge the kids crossed, to recent retail history in the ashland, ky area, to the personal relationship with our mother, earth. always tying back to, always recognizing and being aware of our connection to the earth. of course, there is so much more woven between te lines. this was actually four line stanza, but after first edit, i thought it better to split each stanza into pairs. i truly appreciate the feedback. :D

[October Callow]

No problem!!! My pleasure :)