I Still See You

I love this poem. It is one of my all time favorites that I have done

 

Swiftly spinning

Holding tightly

To the only hope I have left

My world is blurring

 

But I still see you

 

Gently tossing

Wistfully turning

Gracefully dancing

To a certain end

 

But I still see you

 

Hopelessness ensues

Anger floods

Pain fills

There is nothing left

 

But I still see you

 

There is a memory

Haunting my days

My sleepless nights

And no matter how hard I try

 

I still see you 

Reviews

[.]

Ooo, very good! I'd say pretty haunting. It's like everywhere you turn, and in any direction, you still see your lover. You look away, and there he appears again. Tells u somethin' about true love, eh? hehe- Very good, this piece. It'll be alright; just hang in there :)

Bear

[V. K. Harris]

Thats a very hard thing to go through, I feel the emotion. Great Write.

[NJ Schneider]

Wren, I always love your work, but this...you really out did yourself. I have never read a poem I liked more then I did this one. Except My Nymphetamine Girl but that's just cuz I wrote it and it makes me happy. But this poem was seriously fantastic, your best I think. The feelings of frustration, sadness, and maybe a bit of horror. It's like being haunted by something and no matter how fast you spin you still see this person, this person whom I prolly know who. Anyways, Another amazing job girlie. I'd say your best

[Requiem]

You did an awesome job of showing your frustration in here. Though, I'm trying to decide whether the frustration was over you trying to get this person. Or rather your frustration of watching them self-destruct. 'Gently tossing/ Wistfully turning/ Gracefully dancing/ To a certain end' is what makes me see that. The 'I still see you' part of it... is perhaps this person thinks that no one notices them that they're invisible. Maybe to you. Maybe to the world. But you're iterating that that person still matters to you.

Well, just a thought anyways. You did a wonderful job with this one!

[JLMatthews]

That's beautiful, but sad...still, it's really very pretty. I like it quite a bit, you know I love your poetry. It's wonderful.

[David Peters]

think I know every word of this piece,it reminds me of a piece I wrote call 'What am I still to you?, really think you may want to check it out because my assumptions based on your piece are that our respective pieces are a man and a woman both trying to convey the same feeling, really I do hope you get to check it out. and let me know what you think of it. This piece is fantastic and I know exactly what you were feeling. Ima favorite and friend req, if youd be so obliged.
David