The Ghost

A Fiction Poem

The Ghost            `

                          

See the ghost
he's as real as anyone I know.
He comes at night to stay awhile
then gets up and goes.

He tells me many secrets
About the days in which he lived
about the lady he so dearly loved.
He gave her all he had to give.

He recalled the time
He had asked her to be his bride.
Remembering her saying yes
He was bursting with pride.

But then the fatal day came
When lady ran away
with someone new
He, my friend The Ghost
Didn't know what to do.

He told of his eternal love
he had for her and always will
He had committed suicide
Himself he had to kill!

He said he would wait for her
Someday she too must die
He has a place waiting for her
A palace in the sky.

He said his soul was empty
but love still remained in his heart
For his Dear Lady Love
Nothing but the strings of life
would keep them apart.

He said someday she'll realize
that she belongs with him
and by the strike of her own hand
She too shall win.

Well, The Ghost said he had to go now
'Twas getting rather late,
besides, his Lady Love may be dying now
and he wants to be waiting at the gate.

Well, I sit here bleeding you see,
I just cut my wrists~by now you know
I'm his Lady Love of long ago

The other man left me
so now I must die
and go join eternity,
with my real true love
The Ghost up in the sky.

Reviews

[Damien Thibodeaux]

Hi. I was checking out another contest I got up the courage to enter and saw that you had entered it too with this poem. So I had to read this. It...it... is beautiful! So dark, so sad. It drips with melancholy and heartbreak. I love a poem about the dead that tells a story and has a twist. Excellent write. I can see you published this years ago, so i'm going to spend some time checking out some of your other work over the next few days.

[Fran Marie]

thanks Damien, so very much...so glad you are starting to enter contests...will be visiting your page soon...fm

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

A Haunting poem

[emmajoy]

Fine work,a little creepy but, keeps in step with the idea behind the write. Clever twist towards the end when it turns out that the Ghost appears to his lady!

'He tells me many secrets / About the days in which he lived / about the lady he so dearly loved. / He gave her all he had to give.' That really sets the scene until almost the end and has nice metre. Think the rhythm/metre goes off now and again elsewhere but, that makes for natural 'speech'

You have a fantastic imagination and really know how to pick up the reader and transport her/him into a scene. Thank you so much for sharing.

[Patient Poet (Yos)]

That is beautiful poem, Thank you :)

[Fabian G. Franklin]

What a great piece. This had me smiling even with its macabre theme. Just great.

[Bear]

WOW!! This is an incredible write!! Ghosts, yes I believe they're all around us whether were sense them or not.... the more I think about your poem the more I like!!
Thanks for sharing!!
Sallie Bear

[Lexy]

I truly hope, though you said this is a fictional poem, that you have no hope of slitting your wrists.... This was very good, and you did well with the rhyming!

[Sarah]

This is definitely a sweet poem about love after death. (: However, the shift in length of the stanzas (from four to five to three at random) was a little distracting, especially in a narrative poem where there should be some sort of organization. The rhyme was also off when this happened, and tended to sound a little forced. Regardless, it was a cute story and could definitely be amazing with a little editing.^^

[Ray Hamilton]

A fine piece of work, although sad as love is from time to time
Life goes on we should live it to the fullest, and enjoy each and every day
When your love runs off a piece of us does die that's for sure
You write dark very well

With dark poetry if you have upset some people
along the way, then you have done a good job!!
Enjoyed Ray { Not a Poet }

[Adela Muresan]

I loved this poem, and I think it's a great way of expressing regret and thirst for love.

I think that many of us look back on something, that we think would have brought us happiness, and we feed hopes that we will come across it again.

Cheers.

[Mark D. Chevalier]

I thought it was a very neat poem. I've always been drawn to the macabre, so the twist from beginning to end captured my attention. I like the elements that tug at the heart-strings, and unreconciled loves lost. Very nicely done Fran!
I'm also a big fan of history, using it to weave a story so the picture really put me in a different time as I read it.
M